Texting a potentially deadly practice

For a long time, anthropologists and others have been pointing to a significant anatomical development — opposable thumbs — as a landmark in separating us humans from the untooled masses of other species.

Au contraire.

Case in point for the contrary devolution argument: text messaging, the scourge of modern humanity, which now is beginning to actually claim victims.

Surely you've noticed swarms of brain-dead teens standing on street corners — all looking down and tapping away. Or the news that the engineer in last week's deadly head-on Metroline crash in Los Angeles was determined to have been texting at the controls. Twenty-five people died; more than 130 were injured.

All for a backward-leap communication technology that's so prehistorically ineffective it makes grunts and clicks seem symphonic.

Texting, thankfully, is now a no-no on the bridges of trains in California — and in cars, at least in this state. How many more people will have to die — or worse, just look monkey-with-bright-red-rubber-ball stupid — before the rest of the world follows suit?

Other spontaneous rants:

It's Called Projecting: Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has warned Russia that it risks becoming "isolated and irrelevant." They should listen. Those are two things she happens to know a lot about.

This Week's Situational Ethics Award Winner: Mike Holmgren. His injury-plagued Seahawks welcomed back receiver Koren Robinson, a likely first-ballot entry to the NFL Substance Abuse Hall of Fame, and gave him a salary rumored at $730,000. That'll show him.

To Air Is Human: A Blaine teenager broke the world record for inflating balloons with air from his nose, prompting immediate inquiries from staffers for Sen. John McCain, R-Thritis, about his possible willingness to serve as secretary of the Air Force.

Speaking of Sarah Palin: A planned Seattle rally for veep candidate Palin, R-Yahoo, has inexplicably been relocated to Oklahoma City. Something about a more receptive crowd, and a nicer arena.

Read His Lips: Veep candidate Sen. Joseph Biden, D-Comb Back, emerged from what seemed like months of purgatory to inform an interviewer that it's "patriotic" for rich folks to pay more of a fair share of taxes — a fair argument, but one that connected his lips to the words "pay," "more" and "taxes" on talk radio all across the land. An appreciative Obama campaign immediately dispatched him to shore up the defenses in Puerto Rico.

Big Surprise Dept.: After an exhaustive global search that reached from his office across the hallway and beyond, Mark Emmert, the president of the former athletic power University of Washington, named interim Athletic Director Scott Woodward as the new permanent Husky AD. Two things on this: 1) Congratulations. 2) Are you nuts?

BooHooMu: At week's end, our own troubled savings and loan, Washington Mutual, was still looking for a buyer to pull it from the brink of bankruptcy. We were rooting for one of the few remaining U.S. cash cows, the Muckleshoot Tribe, if for no other reason than to see a "WaMuck" logo on our checks.

Old, Like Dirt: Sen. Barack Obama, D-Teeth, chortled over McCain's dissing of the "old boys' network" long in charge of Washington: "The old boys' network. In the McCain campaign that's called a staff meeting," he quipped. Not bad, senator. But look: We'll be the ones making the jokes here, OK?

He's Always One Step Ahead of You: Live-music clubs would get a tax break under a new plan from Mayor Greg Nickels, D-Tote Bag. But only if their overindulging patrons agree to barf into reusable canvas sacks instead of plastic bags.

And Finally: The Mariners' 2009 home opener will be Tuesday, April 14, against the Angels. Please, people. No pushing and shoving in ticket lines.

A section and Thursday's Northwest Weekend section. Email: rjudd@seattletimes.com