Phil 'er up? He did, with laughing gas

Phil Mickelson's most embarrassing drive at the British Open started at a gas station.

That's because he accidentally filled his car with diesel fuel for the trip to St. Andrews, causing it to quickly sputter to a stop. "I told him I didn't mean to laugh," Mickelson's wife, Amy, told the San Diego Union-Tribune, "but it was so funny, I was laughing hysterically."

Fortunately, the car laid up across the street from a Ford dealership — and Ford endorses Mickelson — so mulligan transportation was quickly arranged.

"Typical Phil," Amy said. "Mr. Lucky, Lucky, Luck."

Drop & give me $20

UNLV receiver Terry Furlow was suspended from the team after he was arrested in a hotel casino and charged with trying to spend counterfeit $20 bills, the Las Vegas Sun reported.

Well, duh: Everybody knows bills bearing the likeness of Jerry Tarkanian are no longer considered legal tender in Las Vegas.

Babies on ice

There's been a baby boom at Prince George (B.C.) Regional Hospital, with 106 births from April 22 to May 19 and another 95 from May 20 to June 16.

"We normally have 60 to 80 babies born each month," Val Stewart, patient care manager in the maternity ward, told Canadian Press. "There's no way to prove it, but ... when you think about it and start counting, it's been about nine months since [NHL] hockey was canceled."

The boom includes more than a half-dozen sets of twins; but, as CP noted, nary a hat trick.

Lance a lot

You want dominant? The latest rumor waffling through rival camps is that Lance Armstrong increased his Tour de France lead by another 15 seconds on Monday — a rest day.

"His opponents might as well be riding Schwinn Sting-Rays with banana seats and baseball cards clothespinned to the spokes," wrote Jim Caple of ESPN.com.

Added satirist Andy Borowitz of Borowitzreport.com: "Organizers of the Tour de France announced today that, to save everyone time and effort, Lance Armstrong has won the race through the year 2018."

Talking the talk

• NBC's Jay Leno, on a new poll that claims Americans waste two hours a day at work: "Or as the Dodgers call that ... a game."

• Bob Hille of The Sporting News, on changing times in NFL camps: "It used to be veterans hazed rookies by making them sing their school songs. Now the kids just have to repeat what Mel Kiper Jr. said about them on draft day."

• Boxing promoter Frank Warren, to BBC Sport, on why Great Britain should focus on winning gold medals at the 2012 Olympics in London: "There's no point being the bridesmaid at your own wedding."

• Sportspickle.com headline, on golf's 15-year-old prodigy: "Michelle Wie suddenly skips off course in giggling pursuit of pretty butterfly."

Roadwork Orange

Thirteen University of Tennessee football players have been arrested or cited for bad behavior in 18 months.

If it gets any worse for the Vols, rumor has it, the SEC just might make them wear orange on the road, too.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com