Tyson in a mask and tights? Now that's scary

Introducing your new neighborhood block-watch captain ... Mike Tyson.

The former heavyweight champ says he confronted a suspicious-acting man on the street outside his Phoenix home recently and angrily demanded to know what the man was up to.

"The guy was scared to death," the mercurial Tyson told Newsday. "He was saying, 'Oh my God, Mr. Tyson, I'm sorry, I dropped my wallet somewhere on this block and I was looking for it.' "

Unlike Charles Bronson, Tyson said he momentarily felt "a little guilty" about his actions — until several frightened neighbors, who'd also seen the man lurking about, came up and thanked him.

"You believe that?" Tyson said. "Now I'm the neighborhood watch!

"I'm Spider-man!"

Puck stops there

Rumor has it that the New Jersey Devils — resisting a conservative lawmaker's attempt to scrap the team's satanic nickname — are pushing to have any such lawsuits heard before a judge in Montreal or Toronto, where hockey is protected under freedom-of-religion statutes.

About to get creamed

Norma "Duffy" Lyons, 75, is known as "the butter-cow lady" in corn country. For nearly 50 years, she has carved life-sized creatures out of butter — mostly cows, but also celebrities such as Elvis Presley and Garth Brooks — and put them on display at the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines.

This year, it'll be Tiger Woods.

With a golf precedent established, wonders Jeff Gordon of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, "will somebody fashion a super-sized John Daly out of cream cheese?"

Talking the talk

• Randy Turner of the Winnipeg Free Press, on BBC reports of a planet discovered about 15,000 light-years from Earth: "Astronomers are not certain yet if there might be intelligent life on the planet, [but] they've already spotted a billboard that reads, 'Home of Dennis Rodman.' "

• David Thomas of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, on car co-owner Bobby Rahal's decision to let Danica Patrick finish Sunday's race with a near-empty gas tank: "Patrick might not have become the first woman to win the Indy 500, but she did make history by becoming the first woman not to blame a man for leaving her with a car low on fuel."

• Comedian Argus Hamilton, on Ricky Williams, the pot-loving running back, claiming he's lost 40 pounds: "Hopefully the Coast Guard won't find it before he does."

Sister's sledge

Noriko Kariya, the younger sister of NHL star Paul Kariya, won her pro boxing debut with a majority four-round decision in Gatineau, Quebec, on Saturday.

Ring insiders say the family's hockey genes translate well into the ring — except for that nasty urge to toss her gloves aside whenever a fight breaks out.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com