Olympics on TV
Weird fashion, chopped coverage

By Jayda Evans
Seattle Times staff reporter

MARK BAKER / AP Singer Bjork of Iceland performs during the opening ceremony last night in Athens. The singer's voluminous dress draped over some of the athletes in the infield.

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The one time Bjork could have worn her infamous swan dress and actually blended in, she didn't. That wasn't the only tragedy unveiled at the opening ceremony last night that ignited the Athens Games.

There were tales of water, fire and centaurs. But the wild rumors were more fascinating than the actual production.

If you were watching NBC.

The network spent $793 million for exclusive rights to Olympic coverage. The least it could have done was its homework. Once again Canada's CBUT-TV network offered a more-sophisticated live broadcast, while NBC aired a seriously edited prime-time program fit for "Mystery Science Theater 3000," considering all the wisecracks veteran announcers Katie Couric and Bob Costas made.

On the pleated skirts actors playing Greek dignitaries wore, with each pleat representing a year of oppression: "Think of the dry-cleaning tab," Costas quipped.

On the floating Parthenon representing the evolution of Greek civilization: "Looks like the Wicked Witch of the East's house!" Couric snickered.

And when the NBC duo could have taken jabs or had some fun, they stuck to a script more ancient than the Games.

Not that Canadian broadcasters Peter Mansbridge and Brian Williams had a happenin' pulse. Yet the Canadians were briefed on the meaning behind the ultra-artistic performance that was a slow, historical voyage through the birth of mankind and Greece. Apparently too slow. NBC hacked a good 20 minutes of the show, including the symbolic olive tree rising from the center of the infield, and quickly went through the rest. And when hot DJ Tiesto supplied the beat for the colorful parade of nations, Mansbridge and Williams not only knew who he was, but relayed some music awards he has won.

NBC does earn points for its graphics, especially when it noted each country's population and number of athletes during the procession of nations. CBUT allowed the images to speak for themselves, with Williams saying, "This is the moment the athletes live for."

Every country, including the United States, received a warm welcome in the true spirit of the Games. And after watching a bland beige brigade of uniforms during the Sydney Games, nations burst with color and fashion — whether indigenous to their culture or haute-couture knockoffs.
 
The season's stylish colors of pink, apricot, lime green, cobalt blue and crisp white were displayed in nautical (Ireland), retro (Germany) and urban (United States) themes. Best dressed were the Russians, who wore classy creme-colored newsboy hats and suits with coffee-colored ties. Worst was a tie between Australia's green jacket that is actually more hideous than the one donned at the Masters and Bjork's tangled fabric gown that served as a screen for a laser world map as she sang.

Now that's a creative way to cover up possible drug scandals.

Thankfully there wasn't an overload of terrorist/security talk during the broadcast. The Greeks have spent more than a billion dollars on security, and enforcement officers outnumber athletes, prompting mayor Dora Bakoyannis to tell CBUT she's confident in her nation's efforts.

"Security is an issue, only you don't feel it as much as we felt at other Games. It's not as evident," she explained. Couric and Costas barely mentioned it.

The final fashion faux pas and NBC gaffe was Couric not bothering to change outfits from her "Today Show" appearance to the opening ceremony. There were constant on-air reminders of how gooey hot it was, including a clip of Couric sightseeing with Greek actress Nia Vardalos ("My Big Fat Greek Wedding").

Said Vardalos, "It's the kind of hot where the insides of your nostrils are sweating."

Wardrobe!

Jayda Evans: 206-464-2067 or jevans@seattletimes.com