Why buy a horse, when you can get a cow for free?

National Velveeta, anyone?

Regina Mayer's parents wouldn't buy her a pony, so the 15-year-old farmgirl from Laufen, Germany, spent two years transforming Luna the family bovine into a full-fledged equestrian cow, jumps and all.

"At first I thought it was kind of weird — a kid on a cow?" neighbor Martin Putzhammer, 17, told The Associated Press. "Had to get used to it, but once I did I thought it was pretty funny."

Watch the exhaust

Ecovative Design is teaming with Ford Motor Company, CNNMoney.com reported, to develop a fungus-based, biodegradable foam for automotive bumpers, side doors and dashboards.

Forget that, snowboarders say. How long before we get to smoke our tires?

Pine-box scores

"Not to say that they're panicking in Boston yet," wrote Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, "but the Globe is considering putting Red Sox box scores in the obituary section."

Not-so-fine fine

The NBA fined the Nets $50,000 after minority owner Jay-Z improperly visited Kentucky's locker room after an NCAA tournament game.

But Jay-Z backers are calling it a bad rap.

News flash

Dateline Tampa, Fla.: Manny Ramirez abruptly retires from baseball, exactly one week after his bat did.

Name-dropping

Casey Killebrew, the Hall of Famer's grandson, is a third baseman at Apple Valley (Minn.) High School.

Casey?

"(It's a) great baseball name," father Ken Killebrew explained to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, "and I didn't want to name him Harmon."

Headline

At Fark.com: "California has more teams in the NHL playoffs than Canada."

Talko time

• Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon StarPhoenix, on a proposal to place NASCAR fans' cremated remains at Daytona International Speedway: "Sounds fair. Indianapolis Motor Speedway is the Brickyard, so why can't Daytona be the Graveyard?"

• Matt Tiffany of the San Diego Union-Tribune, on how gift-buyers can be certain it's the wedding registry of Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger: "Rumor has it, the towels she registered for were terrible."

• Vancouver (B.C.) comic Torben Rolfsen, on Ohio State football players wearing camouflage helmets in their spring game: "That's so NCAA investigators won't find them."

• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, on Amanda Lucas, daughter of the "Star Wars" creator, returning to MMA: "May the Strikeforce be with her."

Beer with us

Have you seen the YouTube video of the sleeping fan at Yankee Stadium whose fellow spectators stacked some beer cups on his head?

From the looks of things, it was one out and three on.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com