Baby, you can drive my cur ... I mean, cir ... no, cor

Who needs Lovers' Lane when you have pit road?

Stock-car enthusiasts' dating site — NASCARmatch.com — has elicited some enticing come-ons, like this one from Belinda, 29, of Denver: "Hello peopel I will like to meet poepel and share ideas for a relationship."

"I will like to share this, Belinda," wrote Frank Fitzpatrick of the Philadelphia Inquirer. "Poepel who need peopel are the luckiest popele in the world."

Say what?

• Bodybuilder Jay McGwire, to Deadspin.com, on why he's trying to publish a tell-all book claiming he's the one who introduced steroids to his estranged ex-slugger brother: "My bringing the truth to surface about Mark is out of love."

• Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke, to the Toronto Sun, on why the NHL shouldn't ban fighting: "If we do, we cannot create a safe workplace for our players."

Crash and learn

Video games ain't what they used to be, David Thomas discovered during a car-racing game with his son.

"I had a horrific meeting with a bus," he wrote in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. "Car pieces flew everywhere. And then, just like that, I had a brand-new car, and I was back to tradin' paint.

"Back in the day, a crash like that ended the game. Because kids don't like consequences, now it's as though nothing even happened, which can't make this a popular game with insurance agents."

Net losses

Out of the running for this year's Bonnie and Clyde Award: the Vancouver Canucks, 1-6 in shootouts.

Heads-up

• Headline at SportsPickle.com: "Barack Obama rips off Rex Ryan's Jets hiring speech almost word for word."

• Headline at TheOnion.com: "Jake Delhomme throws keys to wrong valet."

And the shampoo, too

Don Meyer of D-II Northern State University in Aberdeen, S.D., has won more games (903) than any men's basketball coach in NCAA history, but it hasn't gone to his head.

"I'm a small-college coach," he told ESPN.com. "That means that when you're on the road in hotels, you take the soap."

Ice capades

Jamie Sale and David Pelletier, gold-medal figure skaters at the 2002 Salt Lake City Games, have been voted into the Canadian Olympic Hall of Fame.

Though Olympic purists figure they ought to share the honor with the Russians.

Talko time

• Ex-soccer player Tommy Farrer, 86, to the Northern Echo of Priestgate, England, on the hubbub over his former amateur team holding a moment of silence for him, believing he was dead: "Let it die."

• Winter X Games snowmobiler Levi LaVallee, to AP, on doing double backflips aboard a 450-pound Polaris: "Just a big physics test, more than anything."

• Drew Curtis at Fark.com, after the 11-30 Grizzlies fired coach Marc Iavaroni: "That's 1.83 wins per vowel."

• Times reader Janice Hough, on a sure sign Barack Obama's inauguration was a watershed event: "NBC almost tape-delayed it on the West Coast."

All in the name

Buccaneers defensive end Chidi Ahanotu is hosting a big NFL shindig in Tampa, Fla., on Wednesday — the ChidiChidiBangBang Super Bowl Bash.

ChidiChidiBangBang? We shudder to think what they'd come up with for Craphonso Thorpe.

Sideline Chatter appears Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays in The Seattle Times. Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com