Maybe she's just plain Tuckered out

Lynn Tucker got a late start on her boxing career, but she has a great excuse.

As the 30-year-old mother of seven, set to debut in Friday's local Rough N' Rowdy Brawl, told the hometown Charleston (W.Va.) Daily Mail: "I've always wanted to do this, but I've been pregnant my entire adult life. I got married when I was 18, and I've been pregnant ever since.

"The factory's closed."

Pass the couch potatoes

Among the top-10 signs you're watching too much football, from CBS's David Letterman:

• "Only fresh air you've had this month is opening door for pizza guy.

• "You refer to orange juice as 'FedEx orange juice.'

• "You schedule an appointment to talk to your doctor about Andy Reid's cholesterol.

• "Three words: Norv Turner tattoo."

Forget free agency

Coincidence? The New England Patriots apply the franchise tag to QB Matt Cassel, just like Gisele Bündchen did with Tom Brady.

Headlines

• In The San Diego Union-Tribune, with an injury update on Aztecs basketballer Kyle Spain's bum ankle: "Pain in Spain is mainly a sprain."

• From the Sportspickle.com archives: "BCS commissioners propose two-team playoff."

Bathing with Bevo

Nothing says college football quite like the modern-day offshoots of the Poulan Weed-Eater Independence Bowl.

"It is an exciting time," Texas coach Mack Brown told The Dallas Morning News. "I see 7-5 teams throwing Gatorade on their coach.

"At Texas if we were 7-5 they would be throwing something on me, but it wouldn't be Gatorade, I will tell you that."

Cruel & Unusual Dept.

Police snagged ex-Giants receiver Mark Ingram — on the lam after failing to show up to serve a prison sentence for bank fraud and money laundering — at a Flint, Mich., hotel last week just as he was about to turn on the TV to see his freshman son's Alabama team play Utah.

Possible punishments range from additional prison time to getting the Sugar Bowl video and making him watch it.

Talking the talk

• Reader Anthony Pasceri, to syndicated columnist Norman Chad: "Since the Winter Classic is such a hit for the NHL, shouldn't the higher-ups in the Arena Football League consider a similar event?"

• Comedian Argus Hamilton, on a weeping Brett Favre saying he doesn't know if he'll return for a 19th season: "The actors aren't even on strike yet, and already we are in reruns."

• Comedy writer Jerry Perisho, after Rep. Henry Waxman demanded a probe into pro rasslers' steroid use: "In other news, all of the real problems in the country have apparently been fixed."

• Indian cricket captain Mahendra Singh Dhoni, as quoted by Ananova.com, on plans to build a temple in his hometown of Ranchi so he can be worshipped as a god: "I love my fans, but this is actually a little over the top."

We had a dream

Las Vegas oddsmakers installed USC as a 2 ½-point favorite over Texas and the Florida-Oklahoma winner by 7 ½ over Utah in next week's football Final Four semifinals ...

And then the blasted alarm clock went off.

Sideline Chatter appears Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com