Sideline Chatter
Vanilla performance perfect for Toledo fans

By Dwight Perry
The Seattle Times

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Nomar Garciaparra, the Boston Red Sox's All-Star shortstop, is a hit even when he misses.

Garciaparra, on a rehabilitation assignment with the minor-league Pawtucket Red Sox, struck out twice during a game in Toledo, Ohio.

And that was just fine with Mud Hens fans, since Garciaparra had been designated the visiting "strikeout player of the game" that night, meaning free ice cream whenever he whiffed.

As Garciaparra told the Boston Globe: "That's what I'm trying to do for the fans — make sure I take care of them."

Plenty of drive

Dick Krapfl, who lost most of his left arm in an auto accident at age 20 and didn't swing a club until he was 32, is a two-time National Amputee Golf Association champion at age 51.

Handicap? That 7.2 is the only one his golf buddies recognize.

In fact, Krapfl told the hometown Lincoln (Neb.) Journal-Star: "There's a few of them that say I only have half the (swing) problems to work with that they do."

Correcting his slice
 
John Solheim, chairman and CEO of the Ping golf-club company, dashed off an e-mail yesterday to say his kidney-transplant surgery Wednesday was a complete success.

Translation: The surgeons even replaced their divot.

Going for three

Bill Davidson, whose Tampa Bay Lightning won the Stanley Cup and whose Detroit Shock is the reigning WNBA champion, will make it three if his Detroit Pistons win the NBA title.

Davidson, not taking any chances, is refusing all collect calls from Smarty Jones.

Love seat optional

This backfield might sit well in Green Bay: a Packers tandem of Najeh Davenport and Tim Couch.

Talking the talk

• Randy Hill of FoxSports.com, on what the Lakers' defense has in common with Anna Nicole Smith: "They rarely keep anyone under 80."

• Tom Knotts, to The Associated Press, on going from the autonomy of being a high-school coach to a subservient role as an assistant football coach at Duke: "I always had my own ideas. I always felt kind of like I thought outside the box. Now, I don't even have a box."

• Sheldon Spencer of ESPN.com, on Kevin Garnett's half-brother, Louis McCullough, a star player on the Francis Marion University basketball team: "If KG is 'The Big Ticket,' is his half-brother 'The Ticket Stub'?

• Bill Scheft of Sports Illustrated, after Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling used his cellphone to call police and get a drunk driver off the road: "Be honest. How many of you were waiting for me to say Grady Little would have left him out there?"

Saber-rattling

The German saber team — eliminated from Olympic contention but then awarded a berth when Egypt withdrew — is out a second time after fencing federation officials said they made a mistake and should have given the bid to Algeria.

Translation: Curses, foiled again.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com