Originally published October 7, 2007 at 12:00 AM | Page modified October 7, 2007 at 2:02 AM

Danny O'Neil's NFL power rankings

Last week's ranking in parentheses


	Team	Comment
1	New England (1)	Patriots are 4-0, they've outscored opponents 148-48, and now they get Rodney Harrison back.
2	Indianapolis (2)	Colts cornerback is one Marlin who doesn't mind making a catch every now and then.
3	Dallas (4)	Dallas has three Crate & Barrels and one Crayton barreling through Rams secondary.
4	Green Bay (5)	There are DJs who don't own as many records as Brett Favre now has.
5	Seattle (6)	Just call him Marcus Two-fant. His first two-pick day warrants a new nickname.
6	Pittsburgh (3)	Steelers playing at Heinz this weekend. They just won't have Hines. He's out.
7	Tennessee (10)	Titans may not be ready to go mano a mano, but they do have Amano and Amato.
8	Tampa Bay (18)	With Cadillac out, the Bucs' running game isn't exactly the pits, man. But it does include a Pittman.
9	Jacksonville (12)	"Dude, Where's My Car?" It's not just a feature film. It's a day in Khalif Barnes' life.
10	San Diego (7)	The 49ers' offense is worse off without Norv Turner, and the Chargers are worse off with him.
11	Arizona (21)	Kurt is the No. 2 QB. Curt is the No. 1 QB's attitude about those switches.
12	Detroit (20)	Furrey is a wide receiver. Fury is the tempo of the Lions' passing attack.
13	Baltimore (8)	Twenty-seven points to Cleveland? That would have never happened if Ray Lewis was still active.
14	Chicago (9)	Greased Lightning: a fast car. Griese-d lightning: an instantaneous disintegration in Detroit.
15	New York Giants (25)	Giants' bag brigade collected a dozen sacks vs. Philly, more than 24 NFL teams have this season.
16	Houston (14)	The Andres are giants. With Andre Johnson out, Andre Davis really stepped up.
17	Washington (19)	All Betts are off if Washington gets down near the goal line, like the loss to the Giants.
18	Kansas City (26)	This guy Tyron Brackenridge is outscoring Larry Johnson after four weeks.
19	Denver (13)	O. Henry stories end with a twist. Travis Henry's season may end because of a toke.
20	Oakland (28)	Daunte Culpepper's three rushing TDs provided all the information anyone kneeded about his leg.
21	Cleveland (30)	Raise a hand if you saw Derek Anderson as a viable NFL QB. Everyone with a hand up: Stop lying.
22	Carolina (16)	Panthers a loss or two away from having nickname downgraded to Kittens.
23	Philadelphia (17)	Justice got served Sunday when Osi Umenyiora racked up six sacks lined up against 2nd-year tackle.
24	Cincinnati (11)	Bengals are a MAS*H unit, with their coach on crutches and their stock of linebackers bare.
25	San Francisco (15)	The offensive numbers are ... well ... offensive. 49ers averaging league-low 213.2 yards.
26	Minnesota (23)	Vikings have QBs named Brooks and Kelly. Who let Delta Delta Delta into the NFL?
27	New Orleans (24)	If the Saints get run over by Carolina's Carr, they should be known as New Woe-rleans.
28	Buffalo (29)	Jets and Bills 0-0 first half last week warranted refunds since it was billed as football, not futbol.
29	New York Jets (22)	Rocky Rhodes: Safety hasn't quite played up to last season's exemplary standard.
30	Atlanta (32)	Falcons have a Blank for an owner, but they're happy to no longer have a blank in the win column.
31	Miami (27)	You mean Cam Cameron's 18-37 record at Indiana didn't prepare him to be an NFL coach? Shocking.
32	St. Louis (31)	Rams have scored 39 points in four games. That used to be one day's work in St. Louis.