I ask: Does technology make you happy?

It seems that Americans, and maybe all Earthlings, have a tentative relationship with technology.

We're happy when it works and love it when we dare try something new that also works. But we're frustrated and hate our technology when it doesn't work.

I think about this while waiting for my daughter's karate class to finish, and decide to ask some other waiting parent friends how they feel about technology.

One of the moms laughs and answers that she hates computers and uses hers for little besides e-mail.

I ask another parent who grins and says, "It's great. I've got so many gadgets. ... "

He begins to enumerate his collection of tech toys, one after another, until class is over and it's time to bring my daughter home. I know he loves technology and has little trouble figuring out how to use it.

On the way home, I ask my daughter, "Does technology make you happy?" She thinks for a moment and responds, "No. I take it for granted — like breathing. It just is."

Then she adds, "I'm unhappy when it doesn't work ... when my cellphone battery's dead and when the Internet's not working."

Her answer, I think, is characteristic of kids who have grown up with computer technology and view it as essential for getting homework done, communicating with friends and looking up stuff.

My daughter's not an avid computer-game player but does spend free time on MySpace and other popular teen sites.

Next, I ask my husband if technology makes him happy. His answer: "No. I'm happy to have it, but it doesn't make me happy."

That's no surprise either, since I know he doesn't play with it or look forward to new tools and toys but does consider it absolutely essential to get his work done.

Finally, later that evening, I ask my older daughter if she's happy to have technology, and she quickly answers, "If it's easy and it works."

OK, none of these answers would make headlines, and that's probably because they're typical of so many people's attitudes toward computers and related technologies.

Still curious, I search the Internet for articles on happiness and find one that says happiness is a physical state of the brain, which can have a powerful influence on keeping the body healthy.

In another article, a professor notes that stressful events give us practice at bouncing back from unpleasant emotions. He suggests that stress provides exercise that can strengthen our happiness muscles, sort of like a vaccination against melancholy.

So ... perhaps those of us who feel stress when struggling with technology are actually strengthening our happiness muscles.

And I do feel good when I finally manage to solve a computer problem or figure out how to use a complex software program.

But does technology make me happy?

Hmmm. Well, if it doesn't, other studies suggest I can make myself happier simply by acting as if I'm happy.

Alternatively, if happiness is the primary goal, I can eat, make love, help children thrive, excel at work or play, impress people, make friends, be part of a team or help the needy. All these things, I'm told, can make me happy.

But I've also read that happiness, by its very nature, is designed to evaporate. Sigh.

The last article I'll mention says that the happiest people are not those who have perfect lives, but the people who have learned to enjoy situations/activities/jobs that are less than perfect.

Maybe that finally says it regarding our relationship with technology. The people who are happiest with technology are those who understand that it's not perfect, can accept its flaws, deal with them and end up happily successful.

Personally, I'm in the middle. I know technology's not perfect, but I do have trouble accepting its flaws and dealing with them.

I place a high value on technology when it works, and condemn it (and myself) when it doesn't, whether the failure to function is its fault or mine.

Furthermore, I place the highest value on technology that helps me do things I love to do better, such as writing and photography.

Writing: After spending uncounted hours for many years typing and retyping essays and stories, I quickly became a devoted user of word processing when it became available. In fact, word processing is what lured me into learning to use a computer in the first place.

Photography: After I'd worked in various chemical-filled darkrooms through adolescence and early adulthood, photography changed dramatically with the introduction of digital cameras and image processing.

Suddenly, with a computer, I could edit and print photos in ways I couldn't do in the darkroom, more easily and without the smelly, toxic chemicals.

I was smitten — not by the "fun" of using a computer, but by what a computer and the right software could do for processing photographic images.

Because computer technology has helped me do the things I love to do better, I'm resolved to put up with the extensive learning, hassles and headaches that come with being a constant computer user.

Some of you learn new computer technology easily, and some even love the process of exploring and figuring out how to use it effectively. You're lucky.

The rest of us plug along and ultimately learn, too, because we also want to do some things that we can do better with technology.

So does technology make you happy?

Write Linda Knapp at lknapp@seattletimes.com; to read other Getting Started columns, go to: www.seattletimes.com/gettingstarted