A look back at a year of 'firsts'

By Sherry Stripling
Seattle Times staff reporter

	ALAN BERNER / THE SEATTLE TIMES
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A year ago, we launched a series looking at first-time events in people's lives, an effort to balance the crime, war and corruption that dominate the news, but not our daily lives. It was a chance to remember that it's the small emotions and experiences that tie us together. We end the series today by returning to our "firsts" to see how their lives progressed.

My first prom: "I've waited five years for this night"

June: With her periwinkle nails matching her periwinkle prom dress, Bethany Ward whispered those words to boyfriend Chris Bohrer, looking Bond-like in his two-button Ralph Lauren tux, as they intertwined their champagne flutes. He responded with a sweet kiss. It's hard to imagine a couple more excited about their first prom. Between kisses in the tunnel as they were driven to Inglemoor High School's prom, she teased him that "prom means slow dance."

Now: The couple enjoyed "their status as stars very much," said Chris' mother, Leslye Bohrer. Chris, now 28, continues to do well in his job washing trays and helping in the packaging department of a restaurant. Last summer, he helped Bethany celebrate her first paycheck from Starbucks, where she's held a part-time job since graduating in June. Readers from around the country wrote to The Seattle Times, sending digital photos of their children, who, like Bethany and Chris, have Down syndrome. They expressed hope that their children will someday go to proms. Chris and Bethany continue to date. "Now that he knows how to get all the way to Woodinville on the bus," says his mom, "there's no stopping him."

	ALAN BERNER / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first day in assisted living: "This is a big deal. It turns my life upside down."

March: Patricia Williams, 85, shared her apprehension of leaving her home to move into an assisted-living apartment at Providence Mount St. Vincent's, where she was already attending day classes. Legally blind with macular degeneration but lively in spirit and humor, she worried about the rules. Would her TV be too loud? Would she find all "stone faces" among the residents?

Now: Patricia Williams says The Mount is starting to feel like home. She goes to meals with a neighbor who's become a good friend. She stopped attending classes because she doesn't see well enough, she says, and she's curtailed field trips since a fall. But her children and former housemate visit regularly. Her favorite activity is the in-house concerts, where she and other ladies watch an 82-year-old man dance, and make comments on his "bedroom eyes." "You have to have a little laugh now and then," she says.

	TOM REESE / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first drive: "Which one is the gas pedal?"

June: Asami Takeda, 18, was the picture of confidence when she bounded out of John F. Kennedy High School and into Jia Zeng's spotless Toyota for her first ID Driving School lesson. Ninety minutes later — "You're going a little too fast. Ease up. Cover your brake. Slow the car down. SLOW!" — the hip Japanese exchange student had done well but had changed her tune. "It was difficult, so many cars coming."

Now: After her fifth lesson, Takeda scored a 92 on her driver's exam, says Zeng, who describes her as in the top 85 percent of his students. She's now the proud owner of a Mitsubishi, which she drives everywhere. Takeda drove at home in Tokyo last summer: "That was kind of hard because the way is different" — that is, they drive on what we would call the "wrong" side of the road.

	JIMI LOTT / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first trip to the dentist: "I have my shoes on because I'm going to the dentist"

February: The groundwork for good tooth care began early at the King household in Kirkland, where 4-year-old Stephanie looked forward to her first trip to the dentist. Dental-assistant Cindy Buckley gently took the wide-eyed girl through the steps, with Stephanie expressing these thoughts: "Where's the boy (dentist Carl Rutherford ) who's going to count my teeth?" "I don't want to do this?" and "Uhhr reeman water?" (a good first attempt at talking with her mouth full of tools).

Now: "She's a pro," said her dad, Donavon King, who says Stephanie goes along with the rest of the family to the dentist to practice going up and down in the chair, which was one of her fears. She and her sister, Katrina, 6, remain cavity free (despite a photo King sent to us of Stephanie surrounded by candy from Halloween) and both are obviously listening to the dentist. "They make sure they get their teeth flossed at night."

	KEN LAMBERT / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first marathon: "I can do this!"

November: To celebrate the end of her treatment for ovarian cancer, Abbe Jacobson, who previously disliked running, trained for her first marathon. "I can do this!" Jacobson told herself during treatment and then again as she trained for the marathon. Jacobson, the mother of two young children, searched hard for published stories of ovarian cancer survivors after she was diagnosed but found almost none. Instead, she was inspired by two books by cyclist Lance Armstrong, a testicular cancer survivor, who advised people to start moving and keep moving after they're diagnosed.

Now: Jacobson finished the Seattle Marathon in 4 hours, 16 minutes on Nov. 30. It was a little slower than she hoped, but "there's always a next time," she wrote to supporters, adding that she felt "totally empowered and full of joy." She was swamped by support after the article appeared, with a number of notes from survivors of all kinds, including ovarian cancer survivors. "Rarely do I find survivor stories, and these are one of the things we need to help us move forward," wrote one woman. "She rocks!" wrote another.

	TOM REESE / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first visit: "Falling in love with Seattle"

July: Lisa Velte, a Northwest native, fell in love with an East Coaster, Eric Gobel, at the University of Notre Dame. Geography threatened to end their romance when both graduated last spring. So much seemed to be riding on Gobel's visit here last summer that as Velte showed him the highlights she even pointed out that it "smells good here." Seattle didn't have to shine: "I knew after a couple of days apart that I wanted to be wherever she was," Gobel said.

Now: Even before the article appeared, Velte and Gobel were on their way back to Seattle from New York in a car loaded with his things. Some readers said the story reminded them of their first love. Lisa is working with a portrait photography studio as both she and Eric look ahead to more schooling — her to law school — which could send them in different directions for a while.

	JIMI LOTT / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first day of school: "I don't know what it will be like"

September: Starting kindergarten is huge, in the words of the counselor at Olympic View Elementary School in Lacey. And so it was for Russell Ridgeway, 5, who packed and unpacked his school bag multiple times in the week before the first day. Among the highlights for Russell: Riding the bus with his older brother, Rick; searching for a "lost" bear, which was teacher Carol Juergens' inventive tour of the building; and the little girl who threw up.

Now: So far, kindergarten has been a rousing success for Russell, says his mother, Amy Ridgeway. He can read letters and he recognizes words, but he's a little frustrated because he can't yet read the way his brother does. Russell experienced throwing up at school himself, which broke his perfect attendance record, much to his dismay. His father, Stewart, and mother are getting used to their loss of authority at home. "Russ will tell us that things have to be done a certain way," says his mother, "because Mrs. Juergens does it that way."

	JIMI LOTT / THE SEATTLE TIMES

My first day without a cigarette: "Last night as I smoked my last cigarette, it was so good, I thought, 'Why am I quitting this?'"

January: Tim Callaghan, who sucked in cigarette smoke off and on from his teens to his 30s, courageously invited readers along on his first day without a cigarette, telling us, "I have to do this. I have to do this." Clues that it would not be easy came immediately when he answered the phone with this quasi-jestful greeting: "Go to hell." After his story ran with a list of tips for people trying to quit, Callaghan was nearly overwhelmed by the response, which included advice and encouragement from readers that was printed the following week.

Now: "It's déjà vu all over again," says Callaghan, who was smoke-free for eight months. During a rough stretch in August, he borrowed a cigarette, then another, then another. "I'm going to quit again at the first of the year," said Callaghan, who prefers to do it the hard way, cold turkey. He's smoking less than he was a year ago, and his doctor says that most people who quit relapse a few times.

Copyright © 2003 The Seattle Times Company