Nicole Brodeur / Times staff columnist
Taking time to opt out of rat race

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The escalator was packed with women, abuzz with purpose and belonging. Out of the house and out in the world.

There at the YWCA's annual benefit luncheon in Seattle, we would hear from a once-homeless woman who is raising two kids while studying to be a nurse. Then we would listen to Dr. Gro Harlem Brundtland, the first female director-general of the World Health Organization.

Escalators aren't the only things moving up. So why all this talk of women "opting out?"

Why the canonization of Karen Hughes, the adviser to President Bush who left the White House two years ago to spend more time with her son?

Why the recent stories in The New York Times Magazine, and Time, over "the case for staying home?"

Fewer women would opt out if they had more options.

"It's frustrating," said Joan Williams, an American University law professor and author of "Unbending Gender: Why Family and Work Conflict and What to Do About It."

Williams was here last week for another event, a leadership summit on work and family issues sponsored by the Seattle University School of Law.

Most women want to stay in the game, Williams said. They just can't play every inning of every season.

But workplace policies only give them a choice between "ideal mother or wipeout," Williams said. "Women wholly leaving their jobs is a squandering of human capital."
 
As noted in The New York Times, the U.S. Census Bureau found that the number of children being cared for by stay-at-home moms has increased nearly 13 percent in less than a decade. And fewer new mothers are returning to work.

But Williams worries about how time will treat the women featured in The New York Times. Where will they be in eight years?

"No viable options," she predicted. "Or divorced, and living on $12,000 a year with three kids."

There has to be a way for women to sit out 10 hours of a 40-hour workweek without being kicked off the team.

Seattle University business professor Sharon Lobel found a way. She persuaded the school to let her go part time yet stay on the tenure track.

"Either you opt out and they lose you," Lobel said. "Or you stay in as a fully committed employee with a life."

And then there's Hughes. She said she was opting out, but she was still advising Bush every day by phone — and working on a book. Now she's on a book tour and will soon rejoin Bush for his campaign.

All this provides grist for debate. On Thursday evening, ParentMap magazine will host a panel discussion titled "Opting In/Opting Out: Making Sense of Challenging Career/Family Options," at the Kirkland Performance Center.

Panel topics: the definition of success for professional women with young families; re-entry into the work force; equality in marriage ...

All in two hours.

But they'll get it done. They're women. And they don't have much choice.

Nicole Brodeur's column appears Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday. Reach her at 206-464-2334 or nbrodeur@seattletimes.com.

More columns at www.seattletimes.com/columnists. She opts for hard work and a 401(k).

Copyright © 2004 The Seattle Times Company