Aruba, Holland miles apart on gay marriages

ORANJESTAD, Aruba — When two women tried to register as a married couple in Aruba last year, people on this Dutch island threw rocks at them, slashed their car tires and protested against gay unions outside Parliament.

The hostility eventually led Charlene and Esther Oduber-Lamers to flee the Caribbean territory, which refused to recognize their marriage even though the couple legally wed in the Netherlands four years ago.

"I couldn't sleep anymore," Charlene, 33, an Aruba native, said in a phone interview from Holland, where the couple have lived since November. "I felt like maybe they wanted to kill us."

The strong emotions ignited by their legal fight seeking to force Aruba's government to recognize their marriage has underlined a deep cultural rift between liberal Holland and its conservative former colony.

"If we accept gay marriage, would we next have to accept Holland's marijuana bars and euthanasia?" government spokesman Ruben Trapenberg said. "They have their culture, we have ours."

After the Public Registry rejected the Oduber-Lamers' marriage certificate, they filed a lawsuit charging Aruba's government with discrimination. An island court ruled their union should be recognized.

The government appealed, and a ruling is expected tomorrow. Authorities vow to pursue the matter to the Supreme Court of the Netherlands if necessary, arguing that the idea of gay marriage strikes at the very heart of Aruban life.

Aruba, just off the Venezuela's northern coast, was once a Dutch colony but is now an autonomous republic within the Kingdom of the Netherlands.

Dutch law requires the kingdom's three parts — the Netherlands, Aruba and the Dutch Antilles — to recognize each other's legal documents, including marriage certificates. But Aruba's government contends the law also grants the island self-rule — and thus it should be permitted to ignore same-sex marriages from the Netherlands, which legalized such unions in 2001.

"We can't let this become a precedent," said Hendrik Croes, a lawyer for Aruba's government. "Gay marriage is against the civil code and Aruban morals."

Despite strong ties to the Netherlands, which is one of Europe's most liberal nations in social mores, Aruba is more culturally in tune with Latin America.

While Dutch is the island's official language, most Arubans speak Papiamento, a mix of Spanish and Portuguese. More than 80 percent of the island's 97,000 people are Roman Catholic, and the largest number of immigrants come from Venezuela and Colombia.

Few people are openly gay on the island. Locals say many homosexuals move to the Netherlands rather than face persecution at home.

Charlene Oduber-Lamers said she knew winning recognition of her marriage would not be easy.

Not having their marriage recognized meant Esther, 38, a Dutch citizen, could not get health benefits from Charlene's job or stay on the island for more than six months a year under immigration laws.

It also meant she would not get custody of the couple's 2-year-old daughter should something happen to Charlene, who gave birth to the child with an implanted egg from Esther.

After the couple filed their lawsuit, people began to heckle them and make critical remarks. Someone threw rocks at them, and their tires were slashed outside a hotel.

The couple received public support from Dutch gay-rights groups and a liberal political party in the Netherlands, D-66, but local organizations kept a much lower profile. The main Aruban gay-rights group declined to comment, saying it did not want to draw attention.