Seattle clubs will be hopping on New Year's Eve

New Year's Eve beats Halloween as Reveler's Amateur Hour. Under-experienced, overachieving celebrants don't know how to successfully manage the evening and, when the clock strikes midnight, end up alone on a sidewalk by a gas station or — gasp — in line at the bar. Don't be that guy/girl.

Instead, settle in, order two drinks at a time and check out one — only one — of the shows below. Trust us — newspaper people learn from their mistakes.

Apparat, Nosaj Thing, Lusine, Nordic Soul at Neumo's, 925 E. Pike St., Seattle (206-709-9467 or www.neumos.com).

Neumo's is a rock spot, not a dance club. To compensate for a lack of surround sound and proper dance floor, ringmaster Sean Horton — aka DJ Nordic Soul — calls in reinforcements for Decibel's fifth annual NYE at Neumo's: fridge-sized speaker stacks and additional lighting and visual effects. Headlining is German producer/DJ Apparat, wunderkind of moving (in every sense of the word) electronic music. From L.A. comes Nosaj Thing, a beatsmith who launches from hip-hop into an extraterrestrial sound that's soulful, funky and frequently beautiful. Seattle's own Lusine is a reliable crowd-mover.

Emerald City Soul Club, Dug at Lo-Fi Lounge, 429 Eastlake Ave. E., Seattle (206-254-2824 or www.myspace.com/percussions).

If more traditional dance music — vintage soul, funk, rare groove and R&B — is your thing, Lo-Fi is your spot. Northern Soul-centric ECSC and funktastic Dug are Lo-Fi regulars and so is their crowd — typically well-dressed, well-liquored and ready to dance. Lo-Fi's offbeat intimacy makes it one of the city's coolest clubs, but it gets packed to the gills, so arrive early to pick out your spot on the dance floor.

Minus the Bear, Kay Kay & His Weathered Underground, the Lonely Forest at Showbox at the Market, 1426 First Ave., Seattle (206-628-3151 or www.showboxonline.com).

For some people, New Year's Eve can get kinda emotional. This trio of top-notch Seattle bands provides a fitting soundtrack. Minus the Bear is well established in its mathy, mood-elevating prog-rock; Kay Kay is the city's premiere Broadway/cabaret psychedelic big band; up-and-comers the Lonely Forest balance ambitious songwriting with soaring vocals and undeniable chops.

Aqueduct, USE, Fresh Espresso at the Crocodile, 2200 Second Ave., Seattle (www.thecrocodile.com).

Featuring another potent trifecta of local talent, this show is smaller in scale but not in sound. Aqueduct plays inviting sweater-pop — warm and fuzzy and occasionally ironic; USE's gushing electronic dance-pop is kryptonite to bad vibes; slick-hoppers Fresh Espresso brings so much cool-kid cred that a few drops will surely spill over into the crowd.

McTuff, Haiku-Chi at High Dive, 513 N. 36th St., Seattle (206-632-0212 or www.highdiveseattle.com).

Wherever Skerik may wander, expect the unexpected. This Tabasco-hot soul-jazz quartet, however, is dominated not by Seattle's scariest sax player but by Joe Doria, monster of Hammond organ, and D'Vonne Lewis, one of the most stunning young drummers in the city. Andy Coe adds supremely tasteful guitar to the mix; reactions range from spastic head-nodding to frenzied foot-tapping to unabashed booty-shaking.

Cake, Throw Me the Statue at the Moore, 1932 Second Ave., Seattle (877-784-4849 or www.stgpresents.org).

Cake as an option for New Year's is ... interesting. The veteran Sacramento, Calif., pop-rockers draw a deep divide: You feel either smarter by listening to their brainy, irony-drenched classics or too smart to listen to them. Maybe both are right. Definitely right is Throw Me the Statue as openers, a local band that, thanks to impending relocations, may not be long for Seattle. The last night of '09 is perfect for catching them while they're here.

Other New Year's Eve shows

Here are a few highlights:

Dudley Manlove Quartet at the Sunset, 5433 Ballard Ave. N.W., Seattle (206-784-4880 or www.sunsettavern.com).

Dusty 45's, Mark Pickerel & His Praying Hands at the Tractor, 5213 Ballard Ave. N.W., Seattle (206-789-3599 or www.tractortavern.com).

The Fall of Troy, Man Without Wax, M. Bison, Blood Cells, Stage the Empire at El Corazon, 109 Eastlake Ave. E., Seattle (206-381-3094 or www.elcorazonseattle.com).

Fascination Street Cure Tribute at Showbox SoDo, 1700 First Ave. S., Seattle (206-628-3151 or www.showboxonline.com).

Ian McFeron Band at Conor Byrne Pub, 5140 Ballard Ave. N.W., Seattle (206-784-3640 or www.conorbyrnepub.com).

Poncho Sanchez at Dimitrou's Jazz Alley, 2033 Sixth Ave., Seattle (206-441-9729 or www.jazzalley.com).

Book of Black Earth, Harkonnen, Lesbian, the Shining Ones at the Comet, 922 E. Pike St., Seattle (206-322-9272 or www.myspace.com/thecomettavern).

Panda Conspiracy, Big High, the Elements at Nectar, 412 N. 36th St., Seattle (206-632-2020 or www.nectarlounge.com).

Jonathan Zwickel: zwickeliciousatgmail.com