Gift guide: Our DVD wish list includes "The Sopranos," "The Wire"

You want to get whacked by an in-law who opens your gift and stares at it like a handful of bad ricotta? Our crew unearthed a bunch of DVDs and CDs that ought to keep the peace in your family. There's enough variety to find something for your own punk A.J. or Uncle Junior, and a range of large and small to suit your small earners and your capos. If you have the right friends, some of these might accidentally fall off a truck.

"The Sopranos — The Complete Series" (HBO, TV-MA)

You could bludgeon that bastardo Phil Leotardo into the hereafter with this cornerstone of a box.

It contains all 86 episodes of the modern-classic mob series on 33 discs, and plenty more. Two discs of bonus materials include lost scenes and "Supper with the Sopranos" discussions about the last scene in the series finale — otherwise known as that frustratingly enigmatic "ARE YOU !@#$% KIDDING ME?" scene. And don't you move yet: there are also three discs full of music from the show and full episode guide.

"The Wire — The Complete Fifth Season" or "The Wire — The Complete Series" (HBO, TV-MA)

"The Sops" got all the attention, but "The Wire" was more consistently brilliant and its final season — which crammed a new storyline about the extinction of newspapers into the numerous crime threads — is much more satisfying. Like a five-season novel, this is the show you're going to chain-watch and then force on your friends like video crack.

"The Lone Ranger 75th Anniversary Collector's Edition" (Classic Media, not rated)

Set aside the political incorrectness that is Tonto and pick up these dozen discs. They hold the 78 episode of seasons one and two, three 1960s cartoon episodes, a "Lassie" show featuring TLR and a 1950 radio show. And the lovingly produced tchotchkes for your 80-year-old inner child include an 88-page commemorative book, an episode guide, comic book and photo reprints, even a card certifying your membership in the Lone Ranger Victory Corps.

"Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas 2-Disc Collector's Edition" (Disney, PG)

A rare, oddball Christmas movie that doesn't leave you with a saccharine overdose, this restored and remastered edition is bloated like a floating corpse with extras: a haunted mansion holiday tour, Burton's short films "Frankenweenie" and "Vincent," his original poem with narration from Christopher Lee, a new audio commentary, making-of docs, deleted scenes, and no explanation whatsoever about how he could have left that Lisa Marie for Helena Bonham Carter.

"Walt Disney Treasures"

(Disney, not rated)

Each two-disc set comes in a metal container that would stop a bullet. (Hey, schools are getting tougher.) The latest three are "The Chronological Donald, Volume Four," "The Mickey Mouse Club Presents Annette," and my favorite, the long-unavailable 1964 "Dr. Syn: The Scarecrow of Romney Marsh," starring Patrick McGoohan ("The Prisoner") as a priest by day and do-gooder by night. It's from that time when it was really cool if a show was in color. Which, incidentally, I have no personal recollection of.

The Criterion Collection

If you're a movie lover, you already know that these guys are peerless when it comes to first-class presentations of notable movies, with extras that could qualify for film courses. They're all winners, but here are some of my favorites from this year: the unusual crime flick "Blast of Silence," the wondrous fantasy "Thief of Baghdad," and Carl Theodor Dreyer's silent "Vampyr."

"Charmed — The Complete Series"

(Paramount, not rated)

The series about three hot witches comes in an equally superficial yet enticing package that looks like the show's Book of Shadows, with 173 episodes on 49 discs. Brand-new extras include the original unaired pilot.

"The Best Pictures Collection"

(Columbia, assorted ratings)

Look at this as either a crash course for someone whose ignorance you can no longer tolerate or a nifty grab-bag for a classics lover: Eleven Best Picture Oscar winners, with historical synopses, vintage artwork and stills, docs and director commentaries. "A Man for All Seasons," "Kramer vs. Kramer," "You Can't Take It With You," "From Here to Eternity," "On the Waterfront," "The Bridge on the River Kwai," "Oliver!," "It Happened One Night," "All the King's Men," "Gandhi" and "Lawrence of Arabia."

"Planet of the Apes: 40 Year Evolution Blu-ray Collection"

(Fox)

If you're finally going to cave in to the Blu-ray, you may as well start with those damn, dirty apes. Because why wouldn't you want to see every single hair on their furry faces in crystal-clear high-definition? You get all five movies in the series plus extras that include an unrated version of "Conquest of the Planet of the Apes" that has eight extra minutes and was never shown in the U.S., as well as a slew of new high-def featurettes. As for replacing your painstakingly and expensively accumulated DVD library with Blu-ray versions, allow me to quote Charlton Heston: "You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn youuuu!"

Mark Rahner: 206-464-8259 or mrahner@seattletimes.com