Beware of 'Cats & Dogs': This talking-animal movie is suitable only for kids

I was tempted to have my cat review "Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore," as I think she'd probably have a few things to say about it. But the cat was very busy lying in the sun and staring into space in that vague yet knowing way that cats do, so it falls to me to tell you that this is a very, very silly movie which even my 8-year-old screening companion described as "kind of weird." ("In a good way," she hastened to add. She liked the movie better than I did, rating it "two-and-a-half or three stars"; then again, she ate more popcorn than I did, too, which probably helped.)

"Cats & Dogs," a sequel to the 2001 original, features strangely CGI-animated felines and canines at war with each other through an elaborate pair of warring intelligence systems. The dogs, who clearly have better agents, get more screen time and have noble, heroic and charming personas. The cats — most of them, anyway — are either pure evil, such as rogue spy Kitty Galore (who looks like a scary feline version of Yoda), or too hopped-up on catnip to do much of anything. Eventually, everyone but K.G. has to join forces, and both dogs and cats learn, rather heavy-handedly, that having preconceived notions about other species is a bad, bad thing. Unless you're a screenwriter.

All of this is presented in dark, gloomy 3D, for no particular reason except extra admission fees (you barely notice the effect after the first few minutes), and takes longer than you can possibly imagine, considering that the only wit on display here is Roger Moore plummily intoning the phrase "butt-sniffing." (He's voicing, of course, a tuxedo cat.) Kids may well enjoy the explosions and silly talking-animal effects; adults will be checking their watches and wondering whether Bette Midler, voicing Kitty Galore, deliberately modeled her performance on the Wicked Witch of the West. (I kept waiting for her to cackle: "And your little dog, too!")

Could my cat write something better than "Cats & Dogs"? Quite possibly — but, wisely, she's not talking.

Moira Macdonald: 206-464-2725 or mmacdonald@seattletimes.com