M's Lawton taking full blame for his mistake

PEORIA, Ariz. — When the reporters approach, Matt Lawton knows only one way to handle the situation. "You can ask whatever you want," he says.

Lawton knows that sooner or later the topic will turn to his steroids suspension, and when it does, the Mariners outfielder tells reporters the same things he told his family.

He owns up to the mistake, calls it a "very stupid move," and talks about moving on.

But he can only laugh when teammates pile on like they did Monday during an intrasquad game.

Lawton broke his bat on a full-count pitch from right-hander Jeff Harris, but still managed to muscle the ball over the fence in right field.

Carl Everett, who lockers next to Lawton, yelled from the dugout — "Check that bat! Check that bat!" — a tongue-in-cheek suggestion that Lawton was using an illegal bat.

"Of course they're going to give me grief," Lawton said. "I deserve it."

Lawton, 34, dutifully recounts the circumstances surrounding his suspension. Mired in a slump in September after joining the New York Yankees — his third team of the 2005 season — Lawton said his shoulder and foot were killing him.

He had been in some pain since even before the Yankees acquired him in mid-August. He knew he shouldn't have been playing, but his pride interfered.

"I just couldn't bring myself to tell them I was hurt before I got there," he said. "At the time, my body wasn't physically able. I shouldn't have been on the field."

Lawton said the day he injected the steroid he arrived at the ballpark only to learn it was his turn for a drug test. For Lawton, who says he's never been arrested, never got a speeding ticket, never been in trouble, the timing was almost predictable.

"It's like my mom always tells me, 'Good people can't get away with certain things that other people can get away with,' " he said.

Despite the steroid cloud — and the 10-game suspension he'll have to serve at the beginning of the season — Seattle signed Lawton to a low-risk, one-year deal worth a guaranteed $400,000 that could be worth $1.65 million with incentives.

Upon entering camp as the fourth outfielder, he feels a bit like a rookie again, someone trying to prove his worth. And he knows there are those who won't believe his story and who wonder if steroids were more than a one-shot deal for him.

"I'm going to take my 10 games [suspension] and come back and probably have one of the best years of my career," Lawton said. "Any time guys come out and tell you you can't do something, you want to prove everybody wrong."