Family Services gives mother a lift from depths of drugs

Tericia Mitchell will never forget the Christmas she didn't remember.

She was staying at a cheap motel on Aurora Avenue, her mind a blur of fortified wine and crack cocaine.

She didn't give much thought to the colored lights in the lobby window, until she overheard someone looking for drugs say they might get a little extra, because it was Christmas.

"I said, 'Today's Christmas? Really?' " By then it was 11 p.m., far too late to even call her young son and daughter, who lived with Mitchell's mother.

"All I could think about was what a bad person I was," she said. "Of course, that makes you want drugs even more, to hide from the pain."

If it weren't for Family Services, one of 13 agencies aided by The Seattle Times Fund for the Needy, Mitchell, 29, doesn't know how she could have taken the steps toward reclaiming her own life — steps that have taken her through more than two years of sobriety, put her in a Skyway apartment and helped her handle a full-time job.

This Christmas, rather than being a time of pain and guilt, has been one of joy and togetherness for Mitchell and her three children, Durel, 11, Alexyz, 6, and Mya, 2.

Christmas stockings hang from donated bookcases. Mitchell and Durel sleep in donated beds, and Mitchell, saving a bit from each paycheck, has been able to buy gifts for her children.

It was Mitchell's pregnancy with her third child that convinced her to make a sincere effort to escape the grip of drugs and alcohol. And it was a call to the 211 community-resource line that put her in touch with Family Services.

"We go deep and long with people," said Ruthann Howell, Family Services CEO and president. "It can be a couple of years' worth of work if you really want to permanently pull them out of that cycle."

Created in 1892 as the Bureau of Associated Charities of Seattle, the agency, Howell said, is guided by the fact that if you simply take people off the street and put a roof over their heads — without addressing why they were homeless in the first place — your success is likely to be short-lived.

In contrast, Family Services boasts success rates of 97 percent of higher, counting families that are still housed and succeeding six months after being helped.

To accomplish that, it offers a spectrum of services, including mental-health counseling, day care for children of homeless adults, a "Baby Boutique" supplying diapers, clothing and other infant necessities, programs to help abusive partners change their behavior, guidance for new parents and more.

Even in good times, Howell said, the need outstrips the help available and the current economic woes have magnified that gap. In November, an agency program to help families avoid eviction received 174 calls, although it can only take on 15 new clients a month.

Mitchell's placement in the three-bedroom apartment reflects a partnership among Family Services, the King County Housing Authority and the development, Creston Point.

The housing authority, with federal money, helps pay Mitchell's rent while Family Services works to help give her stability — something she's rarely had since she first left home at 14, living with friends, or on the street.

For more than a decade, her life followed a dismal pattern.

"I would run around and steal things to try to support my drug addiction, and wherever the dope dealer was I would try to find a place to stay." With methamphetamines, and later crack, she built a barrier between herself and the world — and reinforced it with alcohol.

"I remember waiting outside gas stations at like 5:58 in the morning, waiting for two minutes [until alcohol could be sold] so I could go in and buy a bottle." Periodic attempts to change invariably collapsed in the face of everyday disappointments.

Outpatient treatment helped Mitchell face the destruction drugs had been causing in her life, and helped her find more constructive ways of coping with difficulties. She now works for an agency that helps others break out of addiction, and sees firsthand that "just because something makes you angry or sad doesn't mean you have to go back to do what you were doing."

That message is reinforced by her Family Services caseworker, Bonnie Cumings. "She's doing quite well," said Cumings. "She's bright, intelligent and devoted to her children."

Cumings helped connect Mitchell with services — inside and outside the agency — that have provided everything from baby supplies to furniture to counseling for Mitchell and her children.

As much as possible, said Cumings, Family Services directs clients to resources and opportunities and encourages them to follow through on their own, rather than being passive recipients of aid.

Mitchell says she needed help with the basic skills of being a parent. When she initially regained custody of her son, she was reluctant to set rules or make him do chores. "I didn't want to tell him, 'No you can't do this,' because I didn't want him to be mad at me. So I had to learn how to set boundaries."

It's not simply compassion for the poor that drives Family Services, it's a pragmatic realization that strong, self-sufficient families make for strong, safe communities.

"We want to end homelessness and domestic violence," said Howell, adding that the agency has a blueprint that will allow it to end homelessness for 5,000 families over the next 10 years.

In mid-2009, the agency will move into a new building on Rainier Avenue South — the first time it has had a real home of its own, instead of operating in rented or donated space.

Despite the grim economic picture, Howell remains hopeful the agency can help people in Mitchell's situation.

"In uncertain and anxious times, it's important that organizations like ours remain steady and focused," Howell said. "We're 116 years old, we've been through 10 recessions and depressions. This one's bad, but with the help of the community, we'll come though it."

Jack Broom: 206-464-2222 or jbroom@seattletimes.com