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Originally published April 17, 2008 at 12:00 AM | Page modified April 17, 2008 at 1:32 AM

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Dalai Lama gives Seattle mom credit for her patience

Few people can claim to have more patience than the Dalai Lama. But this week, His Holiness himself suggested he couldn't compete with Seattle...

Seattle Times staff reporter

Few people can claim to have more patience than the Dalai Lama.

But this week, His Holiness himself suggested he couldn't compete with Seattle mom Jeannie Livingston.

It so happens that Livingston, her husband, Rob, and their children Madeline, 3-¾, and Will, 22 months, were flying home from a business trip in Singapore last week. At a stopover in Tokyo, the Dalai Lama stepped on board, sitting directly behind their seats in business class.

Four days later, while accepting an honorary degree at the University of Washington, the Dalai Lama said compassion needs to be cultivated from birth. He used the flight as an example.

Everything was "nice" for a start and he gave the children candy, the Dalai Lama said. But then the toddler stayed awake all night, "shouting, crying and moving." The mom patiently comforted him, keeping him occupied and walking with him.

"The whole time I thought if I was in that position, I may not have that sufficient patience," the Dalai Lama told the crowd, laughing.

Livingston said her experience would be familiar to many parents.

"He's an active boy," she said. "We walked the aisle just hundreds of times. ... In his car seat, he was fussy. I was trying to console him constantly with milk and water and food, and was always trying to keep him occupied."

Livingston said she was trying to keep the noise down, figuring the Dalai Lama was "probably off to something very important."

And, for the 19-hour trip, she was battling a cold.

"I was at my worst," she said. "It could have been just a total nightmare experience. But even though Will was awake, I felt relatively calm the whole flight. I remember thinking, maybe his presence is putting a calm over me."

As for the candies the Dalai Lama pulled from his robe? Will spat his out, and Madeline took one sniff and declared them "horrible." The parents tried not to let His Holiness notice. The candies, they say, were ginger-flavored concoctions — an "acquired taste."

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Rob Livingston, meanwhile, is trying to live down his role in the story. The Dalai Lama told the UW crowd that the father relaxed and slept. The family says that's not entirely true, as Rob was charged with looking after the calmer Madeline.

"But I do remember craning my neck around when Will was in the throes of a tantrum to see what Rob was doing," Jeannie Livingston said. "I saw him resting peacefully and Madeline resting peacefully, and I was thinking, 'I can't believe I have to deal with this alone.' "

She said it was "wild" when she watched a taped version of the Dalai Lama's speech after friends recognized their story.

"Of all that he's experienced and all the situations he's been in, for him to talk about this family and this intimate little space and time we had together, it was very touching."

Nick Perry: 206-515-5639 or nperry@seattletimes.com

Copyright © 2008 The Seattle Times Company

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