Multiple choice, such as it is

It has been the booziest of times, the sorriest of times.

Now it's nearly closing time. Mercifully, Election '07 is staggering out to sleep it off. So here's a quiz to recap some of what went down in a campaign that was more about police reports than position papers (answer key at the end):

1. Fill in the blank: When King County Councilmember Jane Hague was stopped for suspected drunken driving, she sassed the officer: "Don't you have ____ to take off the street?"

a) Democrats

b) rapists

c) Venus Velázquez

2. According to the cop, Hague claimed "it was ____'s fault she was in the back of a patrol car being treated like a criminal."

a) Bill Clinton

b) her husband

c) a terrorist

3. Hague's opponent, Richard Pope, recently sued Costco for selling him a 90-day disaster-relief food pack that he said contained ...

a) only 5-pound cans of artichoke hearts.

b) nothing small enough to fit down the stairs to his basement.

c) fewer calories per day than the Nazis gave to inmates at Auschwitz.

4. OK, this is piling on, but here's one more for you poor voters on the Eastside. Who has the longest rap sheet?

a) Your councilwoman, Hague.

b) Her challenger, Pope.

c) The judge who presided over Hague's pretrial DUI hearing in Redmond, Richard Jones.

5. Which one of the following is not part of this election?

a) A measure saying the purpose of Seattle government is to "promote prosperity and meet the broad needs for a healthy, growing City."

b) A measure saying Seattle's mayor must give two speeches a year instead of one.

c) Yet another measure from Tim Eyman.

d) A measure fixing the Alaskan Way Viaduct, which the feds ranked as "basically intolerable, requiring high priority of corrective action."

6. What words did a key state legislator on transportation, Sen. Mary Margaret Haugen, use in endorsing Proposition 1, the $18 billion roads and light-rail plan?

a) "It doesn't suck."

b) "We're facing some real crises in transportation whether this passes or not."

c) "This problem is bigger than all of us, and therefore so is the tax."

7. After privately opposing the rail-and-roads plan for a year, King County Executive Ron Sims finally went public against it. What did he say convinced him to speak out?

a) His ego, which told him he was on the sidelines.

b) His machismo, which told him light rail is for sissies.

c) His wife, who told him to man up.

8. The richest political group in state history, the one trying to defeat Referendum 67 that would regulate insurance firms, is called "Consumers Against Higher Insurance Rates." How much of its $10,752,237.40 war chest comes from actual consumers?

a) All of it, otherwise they wouldn't have named it that

b) $725

9. When Seattle School Board candidate David Blomstrom, a former Seattle schools aide, described a group of people as "apathetic," "stupid" and "selfish," who was he talking about?

a) the voters

b) the current School Board

c) the kids

10. Seattle City Councilman David Della groused that the reason environmentalists endorsed opponent Tim Burgess is because Burgess "looks like them." To what was Della referring?

a) Burgess' beard.

b) Burgess' fleece sweaters.

c) Burgess' conspicuous lack of skin pigmentation.

11. What was Port of Seattle Commission President John Creighton referring to when he wrote to a colleague: "I am in charge of the meetings and will not tolerate any bulls — ."

a) that a fellow commissioner was preening shamelessly for the press.

b) that someone had suggested opening the Port's meetings to the public.

c) that the Port glee club formed to sing Christmas carols at the airport had veered into Buddhist chanting.

Answers: 1) b. 2) b. 3) c. 4) c. 5) d. 6) b. 7) c. 8) b. 9) a. 10) c. 11) a.

Danny Westneat's column appears Wednesday and Sunday. Reach him at 206-464-2086 or dwestneat@seattletimes.com.