Let kids talk about feelings, experts advise

Counseling experts say violent events such as Wednesday's school shooting in Tacoma can spark a range of emotions in children and teens. The important thing, they say, is to let kids express themselves and to reassure them that people are looking out for their safety.

Following a traumatic event like a school shooting, some teens may shut down emotionally — or take days to process what happened, said Debbi Halela, director of general counseling services for Youth Eastside Services in Bellevue.

Children who are struggling to cope with a traumatic event may have trouble sleeping, have stomachaches or headaches, or be irritable or clingy, counselors say.

KidsPeace, a Pennsylvania-based organization, offered these additional tips:

• Listen to children. Allow them to express their concerns and fears.

• Tell children that you, their school, their friends and their communities are all focused on their safety and that those around them are working for their safety. Have discussions about those dedicated to protecting them, such as police, teachers and other school officials.

• When talking with younger children, the information shared should be limited to some basic facts, using terms they understand.

• Parents, caregivers and teachers should avoid letting young children tune in to television or radio reports about a violent incident.

• Many older children will already have seen TV news broadcasts. Talk directly with them about the tragedy and answer their questions truthfully, but don't let them focus too much on graphic details.

• If you are concerned about your children and their reaction to this or any tragic incident, talk with their school counselor, your family doctor or a mental-health professional.

Seattle Times Eastside bureau reporter Rachel Tuinstra contributed to this report.