"I couldn't change what happened, but I could change how I was dealing with it."

How did the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, change your life?

As the fifth anniversary of 9/11 approached, we posed that question to Seattle Times readers, and some 200 responded.

For some, the changes have been small — from saying a prayer for passengers whenever a plane passes overhead to keeping a pair of tennis shoes at work in a downtown high-rise (just in case).

For others, the changes have been profound — coping with a lost job or a lost faith in government. For many came enduring anger; for many others, an epiphany that each day is precious. And for others still came a newfound determination to be part of the solution.

Today we share responses and excerpts that best reflect the themes we heard.

Photos by John Lok

Excerpts compiled by Marsha King

Linda James, 46, health information management specialist, Mill Creek

When the attack on the Twin Towers occurred, I was working as a telecom operator at Children's Hospital in Seattle. It was part of our job to keep hospital officials informed on the situation so we had to monitor the news all day. By the time I got home that evening, I cried. I cried for the senseless loss of innocent lives and because I felt I could not do anything about it. I decided to be part of the solution. The hospital was putting together an emergency-response team and although I have no medical background to offer, they did need an emergency-response HAM radio operator. I am not an electronically minded person and discovered that I had to get a license to become a HAM radio operator. It is very electronic, technical material. So I Xeroxed the whole dang book, made flash cards and took them everywhere I went. Four months later, I took the test and got 100 percent on it. I truly believe that we each have something within ourselves that we can offer to become part of the solution, to help ourselves and our country heal.

Conor Cunningham, 32, software developer, Bothell

I make sure to leave work "early" so that I can have dinner with my wife and family every night.

Joan Shott, 53, teacher, Seattle

I never see an airplane crossing the sky without saying a little prayer for the safety of those on board.

Roxanne Halvorsen, 46, elementary-school office assistant, Burien

A co-worker used to live near the World Trade Center ... Long after the crisis, I continued to ask how everything was going. Later, she commented that people in Seattle quit asking how she was feeling, even though a year later she was still traumatized. What I do more since 9/11 is ask people how they are and be an active listener to their response.

Bud and Nancy Rathe, 70 and 69, both retired, Federal Way

We honor the date and lives lost by hiking in the Northwest because we were hiking in Colorado on 9/11/2001 and didn't know about the terrible event until that evening. We always put flags in our backpacks that day to honor our country and those lost.

Michael Miller, 41, manager, Seattle

I've watched my own government perform a bigger power-grab than I ever thought possible, using a tragedy to further their own agenda. Consequently, the main change in my life has been a daily feeling of complete and utter disgust at the lows to which our elected officials are willing to sink in order to rule by terror, and abject astonishment that we, the citizens of a free country, allow them to get away with it.

Al Jackson, 47, school-bus driver and former Marine, West Seattle

As someone who attends many Mariners games, I get warm fuzzies whenever we are singing the national anthem and I can watch a plane fly overhead. To me it's a symbol of our resilience and the inability of those terrorist factions to destroy our great way of life. Things might not be as simple as prior to that horrific day, but we are still the "land of the free" and will continue to live in a manner envied by many countries around the world.

Patty Shannon, 48, billing analyst, Seattle

The events of 9/11 began a 2-year period of personal introspection. Today I am a conservative — I was a liberal for decades — and I have a much deeper commitment to my Christian faith.

Eric Mueller, 47, airline pilot, Seattle

As an airline pilot who happened to be flying that day, I think about how it could have been me getting my throat slit and giving up control of the aircraft. I think about how my industry was turned upside down and how 100,000 people — including 10 of my friends — were laid off. ... I think about the people in New York who jumped to their deaths from 110 stories up simply to escape the living hell of the fire. These terrorists are animals. I really don't care "why they hate us." The fact is they hate us and want to kill us. So pardon me if I skip the candlelight vigils and the self-loathing navel gazing. I am more interested in eradicating terrorists wherever they are.

Andrew McCullough, 41, sales manager, Seattle

I flew back to Seattle September 10th, 2001, from New Orleans ... and had an inexplicable urge to tell the flight attendant that I'm good in an emergency. ... Each time I've flown since I've been acutely aware of everyone around me ... and I make mental run-throughs of worst-case scenarios and how to deal with them, hopefully without hesitation.

Yoshe Revelle, 46, poet, Bellingham

We need to change. Here are some (changes) I am making: I cut up all my credit cards ... I am speaking more kindly with family and friends and spending more time with them. I pray for world peace every day ... even for those who do wrong. I am changing my diet to an organic sustainable vegetarian one. I walk and ride my bicycle more and drive my car less. I unplugged my television and my refrigerator. I am picking up litter and recycling more. I pray more prayers of thanks. The list goes on.

Michelle Ranous, 27, computer analyst, Everett

I have lost all faith and trust in my government. I believe they were behind the whole event and used it as a catalyst to invade Iraq for their own selfish, money-making agenda.

Karin Lang, 44, photographer, Seattle

I moved back home to Seattle in 2002 and I spend a lot more time with my family. I was able to help out my grampa a couple of days before he died, and I've gotten a lot closer to my youngest brother. I get to see my niece and nephew grow up, instead of only seeing milestones.

Casondra Brewster, 39, public-relations specialist, North Bend

The rescue crews at the Pentagon were taking their first breaks since American Airlines Flight 77 had destroyed one whole side of this symbol of national defense. My job was to document. Take photos. Write the stories of those crawling through the rubble and experiencing some of the most grisly scenes of their lives. ... I cry sometimes when things remind me of that moment. It's happened at some real inopportune times. Those repulsive memories also have created a calmer and stronger woman. This little voice inside murmurs: things aren't nearly as bad as I think. I have the power to problem solve. There are three little people who depend on me. It says, you're alive; live well.

Rita Weinstein, 57, editor and writer, Seattle

9-11 taught me that people who will steal elections to seize power will go to any lengths to seize more power. I believe our government was at the least complicit in allowing the attacks to happen in order to advance their Project for a New American Century plan for domination of the world's oil supply. We are less safe because of the war in Iraq, our loss of civil liberties and moral authority, the lies, and the use of the 9-11 attacks only to get Republicans elected instead of as a basis for real security.

Julie Roberts, 44, teacher, Marysville

My birth date is 9-14-61, so in 2001 I was approaching the big 4-0. I was dreading turning 40; it sounded so old. Then 9/11 happened three days before my birthday. So many people died, so many younger than me. It totally changed my perspective. Instead of "Ugh, I'm going to be FORTY!" it became "I AM going to be forty!"

Loren Kruse, 48, chemist, Kirkland

Other than having to put up with the constant "fear mongering" by both the White House and the press, my life hasn't changed at all.

Dee Thierry, 46, office manager, Renton

I volunteer for and donate to more local and community human and animal-rights organizations and far fewer political candidates and programs. I am more irritable because of the ceaseless injustices against the poor and people of color since 9/11, though less astonished by the limitless ignorance of U.S. citizens. I continue to attend regular worship services, participating most in programs where children might learn that hospitality is inclusive of all and where I might encourage their desires for a brighter tomorrow. I have less and less patience for so-called Christians who are not bound by Jesus' command to love with all your heart, soul, mind and strength.

Tiffany Webb, 32, graphic designer, Snohomish

I've had three kids since Sept. 11, 2001. While my husband and I didn't start producing offspring as a direct result of the terrorist attacks, it has affected our growing family's world view. We're proud to be Americans. We're blessed to be free — to have babies, to go to church, to read, to vote. We're teaching our kids not to be ashamed of our country's bounty; rather, to take full advantage of our opportunities, and to pray that others around the world can share in them as well.

Beverly Huffman, 67, office administrator, Renton

My husband and I knew we had to do something, but what? ... Our nephew was in the Marine Corps — what if he was deployed? There was the answer! I immediately contacted the USO and ... a few months later ... we greeted the soldiers of all branches of the service, making coffee and sandwiches, enjoying the brave young men and women as they waited for their respective flights to arrive. ... Recently I joined Soldier's Angels and adopted a soldier. The idea is to send personal letters and care packages to our troops, some of which receive no mail. Did 9/11 change my life? The answer is a simple yes.

Sandy Coyne, 29, software engineer, Woodinville

My world has become less free. The Patriot Act makes a mockery of the Constitution. Increasingly restrictive airline regulations have raised the price and hassle of air travel with no increase in safety. Many soldiers have been retained, recalled, extended for a war they do not wish to fight. Does America even remember what freedom means? ... I mourn the freedom that my children will never know.

Sean O'Neill, 35, structural engineer, Dunedin, New Zealand

My family and I emigrated to New Zealand where we have been living for over a year. I don't plan on coming back anytime soon.

Sharon Sanchez, 45, business-education instructor, Monroe

Since that dreadful morning I have learned to be more aware of people around me and what they may be feeling. You cannot look at others and know their experiences. No more than you can look in a classroom and know who is homeless, have absentee parents, etc. Personally I have tried to pass this lesson learned to both my family and my students. My mother always taught us to learn something even from the tragic.

Renate M. Haberpointner, software-program manager, Edmonds

I grew up with vague childhood memories of scrambling for cover from dive-bombing objects in the sky. The sound of a siren has always chilled my heart. So when I immigrated to America at 18, I relaxed with the freedom and the knowledge of absence from harm. The morning of September 11, 2001, tore from me the mantle of security I had fabricated. I felt not terror, but a great sadness for my American friends. In one short instant, they had joined the millions of people who must live with a sense of vague fear as their daily companion. ... We cannot regain our innocence. But I live my life by countering negative events with positive action. ... I appreciate people more. I include not only my family and friends in my thoughts and prayers, but try to remember that we are all sharing one globe.

John Picinich, 57, retired pipe fitter, West Seattle

I became more aware of looking at other passengers that were going to be on the same flight as me. Especially if they were Mideastern looking. I also look at people who board the ferry system and buses. My biggest worry is now I realize we are at war and that we must win at all costs.

Daniel Davis, 32, systems engineer, Mill Creek

Due to financial implications of 9/11 affecting airlines, many people lost their jobs, including myself. It gave me the opportunity to finally go back to school and complete an engineering degree. I am now working at Boeing on the 787. It was a horribly tragic event but the resulting 5 years have completely turned my life around ... from being stuck in a miserable, dead-end job, to working in the aerospace field, which I truly love.

D.L., Olympia

Flying sucks so much that I dread taking vacations anymore. ... Humor has nearly disappeared and talking to people has become more difficult ... because, in general, people have become so serious and morose. Globally I am embarrassed to be associated with any government now that more people are being killed daily, in the name of "freedom." That's horrid.

Scott Wilburn, 34, Web developer, Seattle

The economic impact on me was very difficult. I lost my house and didn't have a job with medical benefits for almost 4 years afterward. I haven't felt as safe in the U.S. since then, and have felt less safe traveling outside the U.S. I try to hide that I am an American so that I am less prone to threats from those who dislike Americans.

Bridget Jensen, 48, sales coordinator, Lynnwood

As the first anniversary approached, I wanted to do SOMETHING! So, some people from my company decided to ... have an "All American" lunch and invite a couple of neighboring companies, as well as our local fire and police departments (as a thanks for their service to our community.) Local students sing some patriotic songs and play Taps as we honor the flag and also have a moment of silence for all of the victims of 9/11. That afternoon, we go to the local fire department and clean their carpets for free. We (HydraMaster) manufacture carpet cleaning equipment. It's our way to say "thanks!" We are doing it again on the 11th. ... Thanks for your time and God Bless America!

E. Moore, Seattle

The "little" things matter now. I take nothing for granted ... my job, my friends, those I love. I'm thankful for each day and try to enjoy the gifts given to me. Carpe diem! That's my motto!

Kendall Dougherty, 13, eighth-grade student, Bellevue

I feel great empathy for those men and women who lost their lives on that tragic day and feel deep sympathy for their families. Having just started third grade it was quite abstruse and hard to take in. Now that I am older and have seen movies on the 9/11 attacks, read books, articles and followed the news on the war in Iraq, it has changed me tremendously. I have become more cautious of my surroundings and ... I like to know where my family is and that they are safe. I have learned every minute of your life is priceless and that you never know for sure when something will take a turn for the worst.

Cecilia Venzon, 30, registered nurse, Kirkland

After that grisly day, I hug my family and friends a little longer. To strangers, I extend a smile. Each of us has realized how vulnerable we are, but also our common bond in the resilience of the human spirit. Life goes on!

Arleen Williams, 51, college instructor, Seattle

As I drove home after dropping my daughter off at Madison Middle School I heard snatches of news on the radio: terrorist attack, World Trade Center. I rushed home, turned on the television and sat glued to the screen. Two and a half months after the terrorist attack, Gary Ridgway was arrested and charged with four of the Green River murders. My youngest sister had disappeared in September 1983. Now, 18 years later, her suspected killer was arrested. I was overwhelmed with grief and memory. With Ridgway's confession I had some answers. I had the who and how, but not the why. The why is always the most difficult. Violent crime had ripped through my family just as it ripped through our nation. Five years later, we all continue to grapple with the why. I have no doubt that the families and friends of the 9/11 victims will be struggling with their pain for many, many years to come. In the past five years, my daughter has become a young woman and I have become a writer, exploring the world I do not comprehend.

David Hamblin, 40, computer technician and retail salesperson, Seattle

My partner and I decided that life was short and that there was no guarantees. We uprooted ourselves and decided to see the world and experience what is out there. We have been to many countries around the globe. One thing I find is that people are people. We all want to live in peace.

Steve Myers, 44, graduate student, Seattle

Prior to that day I had been paying lip service to a set of values that I believed in, but was not living up to. ... I had been working for an insurance company earning a respectable income and largely content with my life. I grew discontented; feeling unfulfilled with my contribution to the world. My aim now is to pursue a career in conflict resolution. I just graduated with my BA in Comparative History of Ideas and will start this fall in the Peace Corps Masters program in NGO Development at the UW's Evans School of Public Affairs. I've also become involved with ... the Compassionate Listening Project that teaches open, non-judgmental listening as a tool for reconciliation. My goal is to bring more advantages to more of the world's people.

Scott Younker, 45, business owner, Vashon

My life really hasn't changed, nor have I done anything meaningful and lasting to change it as a result of the events on that day. This fact should scare me more than a world of terrorists. It's a blessing and a curse that I've adapted to adversity so easily.

Billie Morelli, 34, attorney, Seattle

I'm less free in my own country.

Elise P. Daniel, 38, communications director, Seattle

9/11 had a profound effect on me. I fought hard against the temptation to support racial profiling. I desperately wanted airport-security agents to do everything they could to protect us. The attacks pulled to the surface profound sadness and anger in me — so much so that I decided to seek long-overdue treatment for anxiety and depression. This was one of the positive things that came from 9/11 for me. But there were more to come. In 2004, fuming over the outcome of the presidential election, I decided to quit my job at Microsoft, determined to start doing good instead of just well. So, for a year and a half, I volunteered at ... a small nonprofit organization that helps refugees from Sudan adjust to America. ... Now I find that I'm happier and much less anxious.

Kristin Crosby, MD, 55, Bellingham

I was employed by a local subsidiary of a large Fortune 500 company which also had offices on the upper floors of the South Tower of the WTC. ... In memory of my colleagues who died, and from a personal desire to prevent future 9/11s, I took an unpaid leave of absence from my job to work in Kabul, Afghanistan ... as a consultant at Rabia Balkhi Hospital, helping teach the staff how to update their skills, the facilities, and the care for mothers and babies. ... I would like to continue to do my part to improve global health. I will look for employment as a physician with an international health NGO. There are many ways to prevent terrorism beyond warfare and universal shoe removal at airports.

Shanon Burke, 27, writer, Tacoma

In most major ways, my life has not changed; however there is a lasting effect. If ever the phone rings at an odd time, either too early or too late, I will pick it up almost in a panic, never knowing if something tragic has befallen someone I care about.

Mary Hoffman, 52, community-health nurse, Seattle

"See ya later, Steve." Those were the last words I called over to my brother from across the campground parking lot. It was August, 2001 ... the last few moments of a summer family gathering. Of course I would see Steve later — later for a September cook out, later for a Halloween party, later at Thanksgiving, later for Christmas. Of course I would see him later. Then came 9/11. Steve worked as a commodities trader on the upper floors of the North Tower. I did not see him later. And here we are in 2006. Those words, "See ya later," still echo eerily in my mind each time I use them ... So now when I do not take the time to say all that I want to say, these three words carry an ocean of meaning. The reality is that I may not. They are now shorthand for "I love you!" and all the other things I did not take the time to say.

Stacey Keller, 51, media specialist, Federal Way

Today may be my last day on earth. ... I actively search for ways to make people laugh. I find beauty and pleasure in simple things like an agate hunt with my sons, a conversation with my mother, or a hike with a friend. My love for my family and friends is unfettered because today may be my last day on earth.

Tammy Antezana, 37, homemaker, Bellevue

It rekindled my faith. I thank God every night for the time I get to spend with my family and friends. And I pray for global understanding and acceptance of everyone's differences.

Nancy Marshall, 44, accountant, Fall City

We drink the good wine now instead of saving it for an important occasion.

Jim Stoltzfus, 42, kindergarten teacher, Woodinville

When 9/11 happened, my daughter was a month old. I looked at her and wondered, how can people grow from peaceful babies to murdering zealots? I decided that teaching would be the best career to lead future generations in a more positive direction. ... After five years of sweat, study, and persistence, I [started] teaching my own kindergarten class on September 6.

Betsey Sherman, 28, Seattle, architect

I did not go in to work on 9/11 after watching the events unfold that morning. I work in a high-rise downtown. The next day, when I returned to my desk, I brought some old tennis shoes. In my head, I can still see the pictures of discarded high heels and women hurrying through the streets of Manhattan barefoot.

Valerie M. Godley, 73, retired nurse, Chimacum, Jefferson County

Looking back on World War 2, where I was during the first year or so of the war, the horrors of attacks right in your backyard (London) certainly made a 6-year-old look at life differently. ... But we survived and grew strong and moved on with life without allowing ourselves to become "victims." 9/11 was so shocking that it brought back all the bad stuff from my childhood ... I had to go for counseling in order to keep from obsessing about those years of noise, sadness and deprivation ... 9/11 did remind me of the value of family and friends ... and that there were many countries and millions of people who cared for us Americans (I have been a citizen since 1964). It has given me an opportunity to tell people that we are not "victims" ... and that we can rise above any tragedy or hardship and become strong and optimistic.

Olga Bourlin, 59, legal word processor and freelance writer, Seattle

I've become more ecumenical about religions ... I dislike them all. It's unfortunate that so many people seem to have a reluctance to throw off the superstitious vestiges of their ancestors. There's just no reasoning with people who do not place importance to rationality and critical thinking. Oh, and I'm not just talking about the Middle East. Read my first sentence again.