Religion / The Rev. Dale Turner
It's incumbent upon us to behave responsibly toward gift of sexuality

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With questions revolving around sexuality making news constantly, sex is a topic to be considered in more than just physiological terms. Christian teaching affirms that the human body is to be regarded as the dwelling place of the divine spirit. Physical pleasures are not necessarily evil, and sex, which belongs to the biological side of human existence, is not a degrading necessity of the human race but can be one of life's greatest joys. Gratitude for God's good gift of sex is revealed in the manner in which it is used and the purposes it serves.

When a sexual drive runs out of control or is perverted, distorted or given development out of harmony with other interests in life, it not only destroys important values but becomes a source of evil. Freedom in sex, without the responsibilities that are entailed, can be a monstrous evil.

Enticement commonplace

Our ancestors, knowing that sex was strong enough without encouragement, did not overemphasize it. But our contemporary society exhibits countless forms of sexual enticement. Sexually oriented advertising that has absolutely nothing to do with the product being sold is commonplace.

At one time, the saltiest thing in the movie theater was the popcorn. No more. The limits of decency have been stretched beyond belief. One movie marquee said it all: "Now Showing — Everything."

Sex is neither good nor bad per se. It is like fire and water. Fire, controlled, heats our homes and cooks our meals, but fire out of control burns our homes and destroys our lives. Water, purified and channeled, quenches our thirst and cleanses our bodies, without and within. But water out of control floods our fields, destroys our crops, ruins our homes and sometimes even claims our lives. So sex, directed to responsible purposes, is one of life's greatest joys but, out of control, can become one of life's greatest problems.

Much has happened in recent decades to necessitate re-evaluation of the manner in which religious communities interpret the sexual drive. There are realities that must be confronted. There is a high level of sexual activity among teenagers; there is an ever widening and frightening scope of the AIDS epidemic, spread by both homosexuals and heterosexuals. Premarital sex and cohabitation, once looked at askance, are now widespread.

Crucial questions

Important questions are before the religious communities. How shall singles deal with their sexuality and remain in the good graces of the church? Shall homosexuals be ordained for ministry, and will the church bless same-sex unions?

Coming of age about sex in the religious community requires that communicants cease being anxious about legitimate sexual diversity. We must welcome the real variety in our midst as graceful patterns for enhancing and protecting intimacy.
 
Openness to change is not an invitation to permissiveness and promiscuity. Contrary to popular belief, there are still a few no-nos.

Many hold the false notion that it is unwise, even dangerous and harmful, to suppress sexual desires. This could not be more untrue. Restraint, inhibition and self control are positive words. Without restraints, it would be a chaotic world.

Not self-indulgence, but self-restraint and self-discipline are called for if a person is to realize the whole and integrated life. Character is not a gift. It is a conquest, and its kingdom lies upstream. It is never reached by drifting.

Thinking people live not for the perishable ecstasy of the moment but for the eternal and abiding values that bring fidelity, self-respect and peace of mind.

It is easy to rationalize our pleasures and let the world squeeze us into its mold. It is the mark of maturity to be good stewards of our affections and wise in the distribution of the secrets of the heart.

A booklet of The Rev. Turner's columns is available. The 64-page booklet, "The Lessons of Life," includes 31 of Turner's best columns published in The Seattle Times. Copies are $4.30 if picked up at The Seattle Times, 1120 Fairview Ave. N. Lobby hours are 8 a.m.-4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday, To order by mail, send a check for $6.05 to The Seattle Times, The Lessons of Life, P.O. Box 1735, Seattle, WA 98111. To order with a credit card, call 206-464-3113 during regular business hours.