Tips for parents blindsided by media

E-mail this article Print this article Search archive Most read articles Most e-mailed articles

What do parents do when kids are accidentally exposed to media that might be inappropriate or scary?

Don't ignore a potentially scary moment , especially with children younger than 7 or 8, who have a hard time distinguishing reality from fantasy. "You can say, 'That was kind of scary, wasn't it?' " said Dr. Don Shifrin, an Eastside pediatrician.

Suggest young children draw a picture of what scared them, then modify the drawing in a silly way, recommends Joanne Cantor in her children's book, "Teddy's TV Troubles."

Comment on behavior that might set a bad role model . "Place what happened in a child's context, such as, 'That's no way to treat friends, is it?' " Shifrin advises.

Don't assume children are processing information the same way as you. Adults might watch the antics of a Mountain Dew commercial and think it's stupid. "But for kids, they might think, 'That's an exciting, edgy sort of drink. That's for me,' " Shifrin said.

Sexual situations might go over very young children's heads, but don't let embarrassment keep you from addressing it with older children. If a scene shows two people waking up in bed together, a parent might comment, "Hmmm, I don't think those people are married," Shifrin said. "Send your own message about abstinence because the screen is sending its message too."

Avoid as much as you can. Tape television shows and fast-forward through the commercials. Wait until movies have been out several weeks and it's not necessary to show up early to guarantee a seat.

Clarify your own values so you're ready to respond. "There is no safe place," said Gloria DeGaetano, author of "Parenting Well in a Media Age." "You have to build up your parenting skills to confront that."

Copyright © 2004 The Seattle Times Company

E-mail this article

Print this article

Search archive

More living headlines...