People get ready, the Bowersox train is a-coming

I realize I don't need no baggage, because I can just climb on board. I have faith. My ears are ringing a little from the new Ratt CD but I do hear the diesels humming.

I am people and I am ready for the Crystal Bowersox "American Idol" train that's a-coming.

...and now a word from our sponsor....

I know my credibility as a big-time blogger has been questioned since day one here at Idol Confessions. And just last week one of my biggest fans (I say biggest because he/she spent 895 words on me) took some shots at my credentials.

"...you continue and basically parrot what Simon Cowell said."

"...you must be really not have any musical understanding what so ever."

"...perhaps you're another tone deaf Crystal voter."

"...there are these sheep, (baaaa, baaaa), that think she's great not because they can hear the reasons why, but because they've been spoon fed that she is by the show and media. And that sounds like you."

What color is the galaxy is in your world Moonscraper?

A parrot for Simon Cowell? I am utterly unsettled by your hate daggers.

No musical understanding? I too have been around it all my life. The Partridge Family, The Osmonds, and most recently The Wiggles. (Fruit salad, yummy yummy)

Tone deaf? Hmm, I bet you think Frank Sinatra sang "My Way" better than Sid Vicious. Now who's tone deaf?

Add in my '80s poser band (Privasy pictured right) and you can see my long resume proves I am worthy. I get the blogging rights to say.... Bowersox is your next "American Idol," OH YEAH!!!

...and now another word from our sponsor...

Why thank you Kool-Aid Man. Now if you're not on board for the Bowersox Idol train a-coming then perhaps it's time for your to grab a giant ladle and scoop up a little blogging media mind-numbing punch and hop on board, OH YEAH!!!

If you missed another one of her Idol-winning performances last night, then please climb aboard.

Casey "Take Off Your Clothes' James
"Don't Stop" by Fleetwood Mac

My barista Rachel (@ The Coffee Miner which just happens to be the best coffee in the NW) should be happy because Casey put on another guitar clinic instead of focusing on his vocals. This is not Guitar Idol.

Lee "Counting Hootie & Blowfish Crows" DeWyze

"The Boxer" by Simon and Garfunkel

Wow, if I closed my eyes I could hear a little Danny Gokey in the beginning of this but the more he sang the better and better he got.

I'm estimating somewhere around a million billion kids turned to their parents and said "who sang this mommy/daddy?" and those million billion mommy/daddy's turned to their mom/dad and said "who sang this?" As many of you know, I am old, and this song even predates me. I went and listened to the original to hear again how Lee did an amazing job making this song sound current. I think he deserves huge props for that.

I do realize that Bowersox's pick was a song three years older than this one, but I can recall a few remakes of this song during my lifetime from Rod Stewart with Jeff Beck to Seal.

"Tiny" Tim "Peep" Urban

"Better Days" by The Goo Goo Dolls

Of all the song choices tonight, Timmy was primed to nail it. He had the strings working, a great song choice, and then he Urbanized it on the eighth word. Think about this real quick, imagine this song sung by Lee DeWyze. See it? Hear it? Why is this cat still here?

Aaron "H.S.M. 3: Senior Year" Kelly

"I Believe I Can Fly" by R. Kelly

Huge song with a huger letdown for me. I think the samples we heard of Aaron with Alicia Keys were far better than what he worked up on stage. I really think the first time he busted into the chorus "I believe I can fly" he should have hit an exaggerated long note there, and I would have even arranged the song so the band held out in silence for the entire length of that long note. Then when he hit the climax, the band could have kicked back into the song. AK has never really hit a zone with me, and this was a huge swing and miss.

Siobhan "Screaming Ally Sheedy" Magnus

"When You Believe" by Mariah Carey/Whitney Houston

I am starting to agree with one point Miss Wordy Moonscraper made, it seems the judges are harder on Siobhan. I thought her performance last night was one of her best all season yet only Ellen DeGeneres heard what I heard. I think She-she has magnum talent. She will be a trend setter for young girls across the nation. But something about her performance felt a little "Wizard of Oz-ish" to me.

Michael "The Big Hurt" Lynche
"Hero" by Chad Kroeger

I like the song choice. A safe pick and performance for the big man.

The Mossy Index total points for the singers after eight weeks of LIVE performances...

1 Crystal 406
2 Michael 353
3 Casey 348
4 Lee 337 (up from 5)
5 Siobhan 336

6 Aaron 279 (up from 7)
7 Andrew 253 (one less performance than Aaron & Tim)
8 Katie 240 (one less performance than Aaron & Tim)
9 Tim 220

All this math above means nothing tonight. Throw out the numbers. Tim Urban should go home but I am going out on a limb to say Michael Lynche will get the boot. Yet another one leaving before VFTW.com poster boy Timmy U.

Pa-sketty anyone?

Since she knows he attracts teenage screaming mobs like the Beatles used to, Mom says she's hired some extra boy-band body guards to watch the house when her pick comes over for "American Idol" loser dinner at her pad in Hendertucky, Nev.

She's made a fresh vat of sauce for her famous Spaghetti and meatballs, and she's added a smiley Tim Urban touch to the table.

As for her winner-winner chicken dinners, here's her Top 3 in order.

• Crystal Bowersox - "I would have probably cried or got goose bumps from the performance if it weren't for Gary yapping over her singing."


• Siobhan Magnus - "They have been too hard on her when she's only singing form the heart. And Simon is an idiot thinking she was wearing leaves when they were clearly butterflies."


• Lee DeWyze - "He's gaining ground fast but this is going to be a "girls only" final.

Mom says Crystal is still her Idol. Meanwhile she wanted to get something off her chest this week... "Ellen needs to stop telling jokes and just give these kids some star advice." Mom's not happy with the Urban soup of the day humor, so allow me to spike this one by inserting a Seinfeld line; No soup for you Ellen!

Count Von Count "AH AH AH AH AH!"

"Simon drinking from his Coca-Cola cup during his introduction" counter = Check

"Pitchy" counter = 0 (?)

"I love you/Loved it/I Love" counter = 0 (? x2)

"So listen" counter = 3

"Dawg/Dude/Man/Yo" counter = 22 (averaged 3.14 per singer)

"Boo/Hiss" Scoreboard:

• Randy = 2 (Urban, Magnus)


• Ellen = 0


• Kara = 3 (Urban, Magnus, Lynche)


• Simon = 3 (James, Kelly, Lynche)

"Simon flipping us off" counter = 0 (Simon made up for it on Larry King when he set a new record by flipping us off for nearly 20 seconds straight.)

In Closing:

• Proof that Siobhan is crossing over into the Tim Urban demographics is this photo. I was at Claire's with my daughters yesterday. This is a high end "field trip" in Daddy Day Care Land, and my 9-year-old said hey dad, check these Siobhan glasses out. Her Clark Kent specs just may be the 2010 version of Gokey's '09 lense craze.

• I had the most restless week of sleep all season. I blame Mr. Heebee Geebee from his haunting performance last Wednesday.

Mossy Bonus Track:

So I was watching some late night cable, and stumbled across a good laugh from "Step Brothers."

Yo dawg, check it out...