Quiz gives new slant on election

Election Day is Tuesday, and you're about out of time to pore through the 96-page voters' guide.

So take this election quiz instead. I can't say it's all you need to know. But it may be all you want to know (answer key at the end):

1. The leader of which group has been divorced twice and had a restraining order against him from an ex-wife?

a) Protect Marriage Washington.

b) The Libertarian Party.

c) The Mercer Island City Council.

2. Which meeting was forecast by one of its own members to be a "grab assin' "?

a) A Protect Marriage Washington fundraiser.

b) Media day for Seattle's lingerie football team, the Mist.

c) A retreat for the Mercer Island City Council.

Match the political leaders with the behavior:

3. Was shot with a dart by police and arrested after spraying neighbors with a garden hose.

4. Was found by an investigator to have made verbal outbursts, job threats, and sexist and rude comments to his staff.

5. Admitted to smoking marijuana or skinny-dipping in Lake Washington (though not necessarily at the same time).

6. Paid $5,000 to an ex-girlfriend so she would withdraw a request for a restraining order.

a) John Creighton, candidate for Port of Seattle.

b) Michael Morgan, candidate for Federal Way Municipal Court judge.

c) Martin Morgan, candidate for Kirkland City Council.

d) Every Seattle City Council candidate except Robert Rosencrantz.

7. Twenty years ago, Nick Licata pushed term limits because Seattle council members who stay in "plush jobs" past two terms get "bored, lazy and unimaginative." What is Licata doing now?

a) Helping a slate of newcomers reform City Hall.

b) Pushing for direct democracy via citizen town halls.

c) Running for his fourth term.

8. Fill in the blank. King County assessor candidate Graham Albertini said: "You want small government? Well, I _____."

a) will resign if elected.

b) worked at WAMU, so I know how to shrink stuff to zero.

c) am 4'11," 98 pounds.

9. What did Susan Hutchison, running for King County executive, do in 2002 after she called in sick to her job as a KIRO-TV anchor?

a) She checked in to the hospital.

b) She insisted that because she wasn't working and someone had to fill her shifts, she shouldn't be paid.

c) She went rafting in Oregon.

10. To what was King County executive candidate Dow Constantine referring when he e-mailed to staff, "I am fully prepared to vote against the flood district and the mental-health tax."

a) His belief that flooding and mental illness are not problems around here.

b) His plan to hold up these programs unless he got a fleet of foot ferries.

c) His core political philosophy, which is fiscal conservatism.

11. Fill in the blank. Seattle mayoral candidate Joe Mallahan said: "When a Somali youth was accused of being a suicide bomber, I called up the elders of the Somali community and I said _____."

a) You need to purge these terrorists from your ranks.

b) Maybe we can ideate a planful path to peace.

c) Hey, let's play soccer together.

12. What is the Tuna Fish Case?

a) A 10-point white paper from Seattle mayoral candidate Mike McGinn arguing that fish could be delivered faster by bicycle than by trucks using the deep-bore tunnel.

b) The Seattle School Board's campaign to aid animal rights by banning fish from school lunches.

c) An incident in which Seattle City Attorney Tom Carr tried to send a homeless man to jail for nine months for stealing a can of tuna.

13. To what was Initiative 1033 promoter Tim Eyman referring when he said: "I jumped off a steep cliff — please help catch me."

a) His career pushing initiatives, which he realizes has been a mistake.

b) That he borrowed $250,000 to pay signature gatherers and needs money to pay it back.

c) That he realizes the use of paid signature gatherers is profoundly anti-democratic, and so all of his future initiatives will be fueled solely by the volunteer spirit.

14. On Oct. 4, I predicted that McGinn, Hutchison and the Eyman initiative all would win. If the latest polls are to be believed, all three predictions were completely wrong. This is why:

a) Columnists like me tend to stick to weather vane hand-wringing.

b) I wrote this quiz instead of meaningful election analysis.

c) This election can't end soon enough.

d) All of the above.

Answers: 1) a. 2) c. 3) c. 4) b. 5) d. 6) a. 7) c. 8) c. 9) c. 10) b. 11) c. 12) c. 13) b. 14) d.

Danny Westneat's column appears Wednesday and Sunday. Reach him at 206-464-2086 or dwestneat@seattletimes.com.