Wednesday, February 25, 2009 - Page updated at 08:30 PM
Danny O'Neil's top five Mariners commercials
Vote for your favorite
Carny Randy, 1994: Tough to beat an ad that features a mulleted 6-foot-10 man named El Rando Grando who's wearing poofy red pants and a golden vest and throwing knives.
Watch the commercial
Lou the Therapist, 1994: The doctor will see you now. Just don't expect Lou Piniella to listen to your problems for too long. "Whine, whine, whine," Piniella said in this spot. "I've had it with your excuses. You're acting like a loser." Next patient.
Watch the commercial
Blinded, 1999: The Mariners retained a dome-field advantage even after moving into Safeco Field as Jay Buhner removed his hat, polished his bald pate with a towel until it had sufficient sheen to reflect sunlight into the eyes of an Orioles batter, who promptly struck out.
Watch the commercial
Telemarketer, 2000: Usually, when the phone rings in the bullpen, the pitching coach is calling for relief. This time, it was someone asking for Mr. or Mrs. Pen. "This is the bullpen," Gil Meche said, before receiving a pitch about aluminum siding.
Watch the commercial
Radar gun, 2002: Jamie Moyer's first warm-up pitch registered a 97 on the radar gun of the pitching coach. The next was clocked at 99. "Ninety-nine miles an hour," asked an incredulous Jeff Cirillo. Nope. Kilometers. The famously soft-throwing Moyer had this radar gun imported from France. "Oooh, la la," Moyer said.
Watch the commercial
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